The Desolation of Slathar

[Slathar]

I just saw The Hobbit 2. Well, part of it. I was ejected from the theatre and issued a ticket for disturbing the peace.

Each time Smaug appeared I went into the emergency exit hallway and attacked him through the wall. Then I tied a red towel around my back and wrote Cloak of Flames on it with a Sharpe marker. I devoured my large, refillable popcorn with such haste the authorities were called and I was removed.

Now I'm eating green and red M&Ms to make my log-shits green and red.