Help me stay out of jail (part 2)

[Fentanyl]

So originally I thought the grand game of EQ P1999 could help me duck trouble. Now I must consider the grand picture. Addiction is a progressive disease they say, and once I got my first hit of EQ the insidious process began. Consuming... at work on break I would look up the wiki on my phone, at night I would lay and think of quests, while having sex I would think of Najena in her smooth robe and so it came to pass that EverQuest would play a role in my incarceration! On Saturday, which is now known to me as the Day of a Hundred CRs I became so consumed in online angst I forgot to call the test line to see if I had to piss. After being laid out by a train of mobs I stepped out to smoke a cigarette and remembered I had to call. Sure enough, I missed the test. Then I returned to game to make yet another CR and after a long boat ride to BB some red con barbarian rogue named 'giant' backstabbed my naked manaless gnome. If it makes you happy, then why are you sooo sad? Anyways if you're online and you see 'Ohmefentanyl' (apparently there's somebody else named 'Fentanyl' on server) pray do /tell... ask me how life is (it will be crappy) and ask me if I have tested and help save me from The Man. Although it was pretty funny, and the entire courtroom LOLd when the Judge asked me why I missed testing to which I /responded " well sir its kind of embarressing but in the absence of drugs my addiction has manifested in online computer games and I was too busy slaying dragons, your Honor." (Shits classic) Which was kinda a lie cause I can just barely slay a lesser drake. Thank you for your help.