Best "Yo momma" joke

[Tornin]

Yo momma is so fat, she eats biscuits like Tic Tacs.

Yo momma's chest is so hairy, it hangs down to her penis.

Yo momma's breath stinks so bad, I don't know whether to give her gum or toilet paper.

Yo momma's chest is so hairy, her tits look like coconuts.

[aaronjames666]

your momma is soo fat , each ass cheek dual procs earthquake..
your momma is soo fat ,she cons red to phara dar!
your momma's soo fat that it takes 12 wizards and the ocean of tears
to cook her noodles.. your momma is so fat the procs from her ass stole your kill..

[Zadrian]

Yo mama so stupid, when she read the "Dodge Trucks" billboard, she started duckin' through traffic.

Yo mama so fat, I had to take 2 buses and a taxi to get on her good side.

Yo mama so hipster, the thickness of her glasses intensified the rays of the sun 10 fold (heyo)

[Marley]

Originally Posted by karsten [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

yo mama's so fat when she walks by the TV you miss the entire lord of the rings trilogy

Hahaha that shits soo long too. Yo momma so fat, I had to roll her around in flour just to find her wet spot.

[Hasbinbad]

Yo' mama so DIRTY that when she went to take a bath, the water jumped out 'n' said: "no thanks, I'll wait."

Yo' mama so FAT that she fell in love and broke it.

Yo' mama eat Wheat Thicks.

Yo' mama rolled over in bed one night.. Yo' daddy hasn't been seen or heard from since.

Yo' mama so FAT the jumped UP and got stuck.

Yo' mama got Wal-Mart on speed dial.

Yo' mama went to go meet the mailman and got maced.

Yo' mama so STUPID that when she applied to Wal-Mart, under "Emergency Contact" she wrote "dial 911."

Yo' mama washes paper plates.

Yo' mama so FAT that her last 3 farts got named Josephine, Kyle, and Laura by the World Meteorological Organization.

Yo' mama so DIRTY that she wipes her feet before she goes outside.

Yo' mama such an easy target that the only dis I'ma give her is disinfectant.

Originally Posted by Marley [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Hahaha that shits soo long too. Yo momma so fat, I had to roll her around in flour just to find her wet spot.

Thanks Jimmy Pop, I like the Bloodhound Gang too.

"You're pretty when I'm drunk"
The Bloodhound Gang
(I copied this out from a lyrics site, and tried to correct a few errors, but it was pretty bad.. Sorry for any that I missed)

One Night Me And The Crew Hit The Road On A Mission
To Slurp Free Brew And Go Fuzzy Flounder Fishin'
Kayjees On The Hi-Fi And The Keg Was Bottomless
Until We Brought Skip O' Pot2mus
And Daddy's Gonna Get Some Probably Underage And Dumb
And Everybody Knows That The Daddy Eats His Young
Lupus In The Lavatory Making A Big Stink
Macing Up The Toilet Seat And Pooping In The Sink
MSG'S Tanked Up And Wizzin' In A Cup
Waiting For A Sprinkle Genie To Come And Drink It Up
Cause I'm The One Bottle Willy With The 12 Horse Ale
After That I Get Silly Like Soupy Sales
Now It's Midnight And I'm Completely Boofy Blitzed
A Six Of Shlitz And The Jew Brew Manischewitz
With My Beer-Tinted Glasses I'm Ready To Bitty Battle
I'm Hungry Like The Wolf But I'll End Up Tending Cattle
Cause You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(And I'm Pretty Fuckin' Drunk)
Here She Comes, A Funky Fried Cutie
Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali Is Gonna Get Some Booty
Cause I'm Mr. Mcfeelie With A Speedy Delivery
You'd Think I Was A Ditch The Way This Chick Was Diggin' Me
But Maybe I Should Check And See If This Is Where I Wanna Be
Hey Lupus Is She Cute? Yea For A Pygmie
Aw! What Do You Know? You're Probably Going Home Alone
And It Wouldn't Be The First Time That I Gave A Dog A Bone
Plus Beauty, It's Only Skin Deep
It's In The Eye Of The Beholder And My Beholder's About To Tweak
I Could Tap That Barrel, In Fact I Know I Can
It's A Ménagé A Trois You And Me And Heineken
Cause You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(And I'm Pretty Fuckin' Drunk)
Regrets I've Had A Few
First And Foremost I'd Like To Mention You
For The Sake Of Conversation We'll Call You The Brand New Heavy
Your A Mix Between An Ugnaut And Eugene Levy
You Can Call It Big-Boned, I Prefer To Call It Gut
You're Buddha, You're Shamu, You're Jabba The Fuckin' Hutt
You Had Harpoon Scars And Your Boobies Were Hairy
I Smelt Tuna Melt But I Wasn't Gonna Worry
It Was 3 A.M. And I Wasn't Gettin' Squat
So I Rolled You Up In Flour And Aimed It For The Wet Spot
I Was Buttering Rolls Like A Soup Kitchen Christian
Then It Hit Me Something Bit Me While My Little Rod Was Fishin'
I Was Deep Sea Fishing I Took A Fat Chance
But How Was I Supposed To Know That Jabberjaws
Lived In Your Pants
At That Junction I Came To Realize
That Only Frank Purdue Likes Thighs That Size
Fatty Fatty Boom Ba Latty I Gotta Lament
That You Were Not A Girl You Were An Experiment
Cause You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(You're Pretty When I'm Drunk)
You're Pretty When I'm Drunk
(And I'm Pretty Fuckin' Drunk)

[aaronjames666]

your momma is so sleazy , she gave me back my money [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[Cheech]

Yo momma so poor she went to Mcdonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.

[Phallax]

As per usual, Hasbin comes in a thread, tries way to hard, and ruins it.

[falkun]

Yo' momma's so dumb she got wrapped up in a cordless phone!
Yo' momma's so poor when I walked in her front door I walked out the back!
Yo' momma's so poor I asked what's for dinner, she put her foot up on the table and said, "Corn!"
Yo' momma's so poor I rang the doorbell at your house and the toilet flushed!
Yo' momma's so fat God said, "Let there be light," and he asked her to move!
Yo' momma's so fat she stepped on a scale and it said, "One at a time, please!"

[Anger]

Yo momma so fat....Tralina.