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What about this NPC?
Well fiddly-dum un fiddly-dee Adventurers wait but not for me. I no get da chance to scratch my bum When pet attacks me, itz owner iz glum. My pirate frend perhaps him next? Or sometink bigger soon to be hexed. I lies down now and looks at the sky, The player he'll give dis another try. Who am I? (NPC name)
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