What are you listening to?

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

And lets just add more onto my giant pile of weird posts.

Green Day - Jesus Of Suburbia

and

Green Day St. Jimmy (Jim used to be me alias on counter-strike)

I used to repeat things in my head over and over again until I couldn't stop. When the secret society would make a noise, I thought it was a sign and I would try to decode whatever was around me or saw, or thought was the message. I literally couldn't stop repeating things in my head. Like if I saw a blue pen, and I thought to decode it; I would think to myself, "Blue Pen.... Blue pen.. like blue eyes... pen backwards nep... nope... like NOPE.. like NO! No blue. Sound like glue... Blue blue blue blue." And would repeat the lesson learned over and over. Probably it originated in trying to, "Learn." messages to become a better person. Its what happens when people torture you to the rhythm of your mind to shut it off. (As I have to verify, "Shutting it off." but no thanks.) I remember for at least .001 seconds. (Just for technicality purposes of the file in my mind.) I thought I was the son of Jesus and everyone was watching me being tortured in order to become a good person again. Like as if they were routing for me while I was being tortured. (This was in college so, about 13 years ago.) I ran the furthest in my life because I thought I had to learn that exercises was good and then maybe that would be the reason the secret society would stop torturing me.

*Crosses legs like a psychologist*

"Have you ever thought of not being a child?"

[Ennewi]

Markov Chain Generator

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

Music video might not be appropriate but... /shrugs

Confidence Man - Out the Window

with a Marry Magdalene vibe and I'm loving it. I'd love to scoop her up. no offense if its not ladies of the night, but gives that vibe. and of course no offense to ladies of the night.

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

Puddle of Mudd - She Fucking Hates Me

I haven't thought all women were evil in a while. And statistically it doesn't seem to make sense. Unless they are clones like the people who believe this world is real. Especially because I can see how people say my past was not good to his ex-girlfriend. But my mom just threw me in a loop in a debate in mind. Arguing about all the different variation of the 10 version of mean and what they mean or whatever. I still cant grasp it all. Fighting muslims and demons in a debate is one thing. But having my tired mind run in a loop about minor details about the ups and downs of what mean means, is completely another thing. I'm running out of my days. I've done this for too long. I keep thinking after starting many Armageddon I might get out one day. But maybe not.

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

Beck - Loser

Foster The People - Pumped up Kicks

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

How I found out my past erased his memory, was a CD with a memory attached to it that he did. There was another CD where he told me, the only way to leave this place is suicide. That would suck if that were true.

[Ret.SaxonAlex]

I'm aware I could be B********ed in prison forever, or a mental hospital, or worse. But I've been tortured at the end of the world and starting Armageddon forever. I hope I can crush my enemies soon and make someone finally feel bad for me being tortured, against my will. I keep telling Antifa, that I am not a conservative cop. I hope the rapture comes and I can destroy some peoples will power and societies. Being tortured like this I have hoped for that many times. Like rain that never comes in the desert. But I hope it comes soon. I keep telling Antifa they can shoot me in the head if they want and that they might run out of the chance to do it, so they should do it soon. If Antifa kills me, I will tell God this whole world is G** and that all it was, was suffering and that I am ready for the next reincarnation. I won't even hold it against them, for killing me. I will just tell God the world was G** and I am ready to move on. I'm sure I will be afraid at the time though.

Nirvana - The Man Who Sold The World

I'd rather die than go to a mental hospital again. So if you try that, though I am a spoiled white pussy, expect a fight. If police try to lock me in a mental hospital, they will be treated as demonic souless evil ghosts, from a world that is a fake existence that makes no sense. HEY I did it without booze this time, so they can't say alcohol is bad lol. I get 1% braver everytime this happens. Good for me.

[Knuckle]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwU0...rhzRBo&index=2

phenomenal mix, video game arrangements remixed are amazing, been down this rabbit hole ~20 years almost.

[BarnabusCollins]

Megadeath

[nostalgiaquest]

Originally Posted by BarnabusCollins [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Megadeath

*deth*