Can’t forgive my wife, missed green launch. - Page 2

YendorLootmonkey · #1 09-06-2020, 02:37 PM

Your wife has deeply-rooted childhood feelings of abandonment by her parents both messing around with their computers instead of spending time with her.

"Mommy want to play tea party with me?"

"Sorry, honey... gotta log into the BBS and play some Trade Wars 2002!"

So the second you want time on the computer, she feels the abandonment and playing second fiddle to a computer for attention all over again. I feel like this might require some couples therapy to help her work through you playing the computer for a few hours a night is not abandoning her... it is simply a personal hobby where you get some "you time" in the marriage, and she's even welcome to join you if she wants so you are still spending time with her.

But yeah, she needs to understand that preventing you from enjoying a hobby because of baggage she has from her childhood isn't fair to you.

Aeaolena · #2 09-07-2020, 04:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YendorLootmonkey [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Your wife has deeply-rooted childhood feelings of abandonment by her parents both messing around with their computers instead of spending time with her.

"Mommy want to play tea party with me?"

"Sorry, honey... gotta log into the BBS and play some Trade Wars 2002!"

So the second you want time on the computer, she feels the abandonment and playing second fiddle to a computer for attention all over again. I feel like this might require some couples therapy to help her work through you playing the computer for a few hours a night is not abandoning her... it is simply a personal hobby where you get some "you time" in the marriage, and she's even welcome to join you if she wants so you are still spending time with her.

But yeah, she needs to understand that preventing you from enjoying a hobby because of baggage she has from her childhood isn't fair to you.

What Yendor said.

-------------

As a bandaid, you can try playing P1999 on a tablet. I'm not 100% sure it's possible, but I heard a rumor. Might keep her from feeling triggered.

As a second bandaid - you can try to get her to play again. But this time sell it as a social activity. Get in discord with a few guild pals and form an alt group, with people talking/chilling over headsets chatting about random stuff. Then it's not a her-you thing, it's a beat-social-isolation by making pals and playing together as a large group thing. That makes it different than Diablo in a better way.

If that doesn't work - you could possibly try to set a routine/schedule of together time so everyone has expectations on even keel. If she knows you'll be hanging out in the evening with her on Mon/Wed/Friday night to watch Netflix/Diablo, and you'll be having some recharge time on Tue/Thur/Sat.. she's more likely to schedule a zoom call with a friend on Tue/Thur/Sat, and not feel lonely or that you "chose" a game over her. There won't be any choosing because it's a routine you both talked about and agreed to.

Good luck!

Luigi · #3 09-07-2020, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aeaolena [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

What Yendor said.

-------------

As a bandaid, you can try playing P1999 on a tablet. I'm not 100% sure it's possible, but I heard a rumor. Might keep her from feeling triggered.

As a second bandaid - you can try to get her to play again. But this time sell it as a social activity. Get in discord with a few guild pals and form an alt group, with people talking/chilling over headsets chatting about random stuff. Then it's not a her-you thing, it's a beat-social-isolation by making pals and playing together as a large group thing. That makes it different than Diablo in a better way.

If that doesn't work - you could possibly try to set a routine/schedule of together time so everyone has expectations on even keel. If she knows you'll be hanging out in the evening with her on Mon/Wed/Friday night to watch Netflix/Diablo, and you'll be having some recharge time on Tue/Thur/Sat.. she's more likely to schedule a zoom call with a friend on Tue/Thur/Sat, and not feel lonely or that you "chose" a game over her. There won't be any choosing because it's a routine you both talked about and agreed to.

Good luck!

This is what a pussy would post

know what you should do? Get on tinder or bumble and start giggling for hours on late night phonecalls with girls that will tune her right up i promise

Also open another bank account and start transferring money into it so she seems the statements, guaranteed attitude adjustment

Tankwipe · #4 09-07-2020, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luigi [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

This is what a pussy would post

know what you should do? Get on tinder or bumble and start giggling for hours on late night phonecalls with girls that will tune her right up i promise

Also open another bank account and start transferring money into it so she seems the statements, guaranteed attitude adjustment

https://i.imgur.com/mZbf4lb.jpg