I gotta quit EQ again.

[magnetaress]

Well. I don't want to be overly dramatic butt EQ was one of my last habits that got me out of bed at all. I actually stretched and exercised and ate food so I could sporadically spend EQ time soloing between long afks.

This Christmas was really nice with family and physically rough tho. And I'm realizing that while EQ is my only escape from a completely crippled body it's not fun anymore. It's just something I am doing because I don't have the capacity to do anything more. And it's too painful emotionally to keep coming back to a game that takes everything.

Honestly I just want to go to hospice or get pain meds and start the process of dying now.

Those who say I'll be back. You're probably right. I'll probably reroll a necromancer or something and be a completely timid shut in avoiding any challenge or contact butt just logging in for something to try to do.

I have been hitting the audio books with my eyes shut curled when I can. When I can't EQ.

Yeah it's a cry for help. Butt I don't want or need any. My therapist and I have already been discussing an exit plan with the resources available for me through the VA.

Just. It fucking sucks. I wanted to be able to play this game and make friends. The biggest issue with that is that I can't play long enough continously to be friends and help ppl. That said I had a ton of nice and friendly interactions with ppl. Got to buff ppl with low lvl cleric buffs. Butt that corpse in guk. It's going to rott. With lvl 34 spells and jboots. I can't recover it. It's too much work solo. It's too emotionally painful. It's my reminder that I
am not even good enough to play EQ on quarm in 2023. That is my sign to quit.

[Infectious]

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Well. I don't want to be overly dramatic butt EQ was one of my last habits that got me out of bed at all. I actually stretched and exercised and ate food so I could sporadically spend EQ time soloing between long afks.

This Christmas was really nice with family and physically rough tho. And I'm realizing that while EQ is my only escape from a completely crippled body it's not fun anymore. It's just something I am doing because I don't have the capacity to do anything more. And it's too painful emotionally to keep coming back to a game that takes everything.

Honestly I just want to go to hospice or get pain meds and start the process of dying now.

Those who say I'll be back. You're probably right. I'll probably reroll a necromancer or something and be a completely timid shut in avoiding any challenge or contact butt just logging in for something to try to do.

I have been hitting the audio books with my eyes shut curled when I can. When I can't EQ.

Yeah it's a cry for help. Butt I don't want or need any. My therapist and I have already been discussing an exit plan with the resources available for me through the VA.

Just. It fucking sucks. I wanted to be able to play this game and make friends. The biggest issue with that is that I can't play long enough continously to be friends and help ppl. That said I had a ton of nice and friendly interactions with ppl. Got to buff ppl with low lvl cleric buffs. Butt that corpse in guk. It's going to rott. With lvl 34 spells and jboots. I can't recover it. It's too much work solo. It's too emotionally painful. It's my reminder that I
am not even good enough to play EQ on quarm in 2023. That is my sign to quit.

You're soft and will probably quit at whatever you do. Stop being a pussy and get your ass out of bed. Everquest isn't the problem, your whole cry baby entitlement is the problem. How the hell do you pay your bills and lay in bed all day?

[magnetaress]

Originally Posted by Infectious [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

You're soft and will probably quit at whatever you do. Stop being a pussy and get your ass out of bed. Everquest isn't the problem, your whole cry baby entitlement is the problem. How the hell do you pay your bills and lay in bed all day?

I joined the army and graduated basic. And got an honorable discharge after four years before becoming a retard.

On the upside I wasn't in the reserve and in Maine.

What did you do? It's not a competition. If you work as a bag boi. Thanks for getting up every day and participating in society.

Point being I wasn't always a "pussy".

I had a bunch of 60s in EQ and on red99.

So.

It's not about what I have done. I am bitching about what I am losing though. So yeah. I'm being a pussy. I feel a bit entitled tho considering I am not contributing to the downfall of civilization and the rise of global communism. That being said, things could be way worse.

Thanks for not being my friend though . While you're honest and genuine. You'd make a shitty one. And your perspective is smaller than mine. While lacking at least my own introspection. Too many people in this world are focused on what others do and don't do.

Seek Jesus and G-d bless.

[Infectious]

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I joined the army and graduated basic. And got an honorable discharge after four years before becoming a retard.

On the upside I wasn't in the reserve and in Maine.

What did you do? It's not a competition. If you work as a bag boi. Thanks for getting up every day and participating in society.

Point being I wasn't always a "pussy".

I had a bunch of 60s in EQ and on red99.

So.

It's not about what I have done. I am bitching about what I am losing though. So yeah. I'm being a pussy. I feel a bit entitled tho considering I am not contributing to the downfall of civilization and the rise of global communism. That being said, things could be way worse.

Thanks for not being my friend though . While you're honest and genuine. You'd make a shitty one. And your perspective is smaller than mine. While lacking at least my own introspection. Too many people in this world are focused on what others do and don't do.

Seek Jesus and G-d bless.

Quit or shut up. Who are you trying to convince hazel?

[Lune]

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Honestly I just want to go to hospice or get pain meds and start the process of dying now.

Unfortunately I think you gotta have a terminal illness to qualify for hospice, and oddly enough they don't consider being bored of EQ a terminal illness. Funny how they split hairs. Maybe some day.

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Well. I don't want to be overly dramatic butt EQ was one of my last habits that got me out of bed at all. I actually stretched and exercised and ate food so I could sporadically spend EQ time soloing between long afks.

This Christmas was really nice with family and physically rough tho. And I'm realizing that while EQ is my only escape from a completely crippled body it's not fun anymore. It's just something I am doing because I don't have the capacity to do anything more. And it's too painful emotionally to keep coming back to a game that takes everything.

Honestly I just want to go to hospice or get pain meds and start the process of dying now.

Those who say I'll be back. You're probably right. I'll probably reroll a necromancer or something and be a completely timid shut in avoiding any challenge or contact butt just logging in for something to try to do.

I have been hitting the audio books with my eyes shut curled when I can. When I can't EQ.

Yeah it's a cry for help. Butt I don't want or need any. My therapist and I have already been discussing an exit plan with the resources available for me through the VA.

Just. It fucking sucks. I wanted to be able to play this game and make friends. The biggest issue with that is that I can't play long enough continously to be friends and help ppl. That said I had a ton of nice and friendly interactions with ppl. Got to buff ppl with low lvl cleric buffs. Butt that corpse in guk. It's going to rott. With lvl 34 spells and jboots. I can't recover it. It's too much work solo. It's too emotionally painful. It's my reminder that I
am not even good enough to play EQ on quarm in 2023. That is my sign to quit.

Yesterday I went to Aliberto's Jr in downtown Seattle, somehow their big ass carne asada burrito is still only $7.99; I don't think I really want to know how that is still profitable for them. It tastes somewhere between taco bell and actual food. I ate it in front of a homeless man. I've been violently blasting into my toilet like krakatoa on and off for the past 24 hours, which was exactly the experience I was looking for. I'm eating an edible and going back tonight to try their chorizo. Probably going to need a colostomy bag.

EQ is ur dirty ass burrito and your life is the explosive diarrhea. I don't know what you have to be sad about tbh. What more could you have wanted out of life than miserable, unending cycle of binge and spray? Some people work their entire lives to achieve this lifestyle. It's an inspiration, honestly. I will witness you and continue my descent into retardation in your honor

[strongNpretty]

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Well. I don't want to be overly dramatic butt EQ was one of my last habits that got me out of bed at all. I actually stretched and exercised and ate food so I could sporadically spend EQ time soloing between long afks.

This Christmas was really nice with family and physically rough tho. And I'm realizing that while EQ is my only escape from a completely crippled body it's not fun anymore. It's just something I am doing because I don't have the capacity to do anything more. And it's too painful emotionally to keep coming back to a game that takes everything.

Honestly I just want to go to hospice or get pain meds and start the process of dying now.

Those who say I'll be back. You're probably right. I'll probably reroll a necromancer or something and be a completely timid shut in avoiding any challenge or contact butt just logging in for something to try to do.

I have been hitting the audio books with my eyes shut curled when I can. When I can't EQ.

Yeah it's a cry for help. Butt I don't want or need any. My therapist and I have already been discussing an exit plan with the resources available for me through the VA.

Just. It fucking sucks. I wanted to be able to play this game and make friends. The biggest issue with that is that I can't play long enough continously to be friends and help ppl. That said I had a ton of nice and friendly interactions with ppl. Got to buff ppl with low lvl cleric buffs. Butt that corpse in guk. It's going to rott. With lvl 34 spells and jboots. I can't recover it. It's too much work solo. It's too emotionally painful. It's my reminder that I
am not even good enough to play EQ on quarm in 2023. That is my sign to quit.

Hang in there Magnet. Life is tough, it truly is. And anybody saying otherwise is lying. I had reached a point earlier this year, where i really felt down myself. Just working, and saving. And not really thinkin about the future since i was doing all the things you're supposed to be doing as an adult. Decided to save up PTO and book a month long solo adventure to Philippines and it completely changed my life.

My advice- Book a flight to somewhere outside of the states. Go alone, have an adventure and an experience. Preferably in a place where the exchange rate benefits you. You just might find yourself again. Or you might find yourself for the first time ever.

[magnetaress]

Also yes I know one of the reasons I don't have a lot of in game friends is because I am a completely flaky headcase. And a hermit. Im not mean or disruptive in game. Just too asocial to stay in contact with anyone or any guild. I am this way irl too. Very unable to form attachments or be there for others.

And I fucking hate it. It's wrong for me to even try when I can't guarantee I'll be there next week. I've suddenly disappeared too many times in my life when things got more serious. I can't do that any.

It sucks to leave this place permanently. Too. Buttttt I really should. I guess.

[Trexller]

Originally Posted by magnetaress [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

And I fucking hate it. It's wrong for me to even try when I can't guarantee I'll be there next week.

stop thinking about it and just go grind xp

being unable to guarantee you can't be there next week, doesn't change the fact that you will be there next week

[Naethyn]

Turn real life into eq.

[magnetaress]

Gonna die. Can't be there for friends and family. Just waiting for the coffin lid to close and then the nails to be hammered in.

It's for the best. I am not a good EQ player or community mer.