How long until you fart

[Ephirith]

One time in college I was being used by a girl I liked, and spent a couple hours fixing her god awful paper at my apartment. Before she came over, I had gone to the costco food court and eaten a chicken bake, 2 slices of pizza, and a polish dog. We sat down on my couch and I worked with her. The entire time I had to fart so fucking bad; immense pressure was building inside my anus to the point where I thought if I shifted in my seat too briskly it would explode out of my rectum. There were faintly audible internal farts, pops, and groans as the gas thrashed around inside by bowels but I tried my best to disguise it with my voice. I knew that even if I went to the bathroom, there would be no guarantee I would be able to let it out quietly-- as it was, I had to physically concentrate on tightening my asshole to keep it in safely.

Finally after several hours of holding in the brewing storm, she got up to leave. I followed her to the door and closed it behind her. The instant the door closed, with my hand still on the handle, I spread my legs a little, bent over slightly, and grimaced as a raging tempest of hot gas surged out of my asshole. There was a sharp crack, a deep rumble, and then a gurgle as my sphincter struggled under the onslaught. The gust lasted for a good 5 or 6 seconds and it left my butthole stinging.

Several moments after it was over, I heard very clear footsteps from outside-- I looked at the window a few feet from the door and saw that, although the blinds were closed, it was wide open.

She never asked for help again.

[Ahldagor]

if she can't handle your gas
then she ain't worth the ass

[Kagatob]

Originally Posted by Ahldagor [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

if she can't handle your gas
then she ain't worth the ass

Yep, dumb bitch ain't worth shit.

[gotrocks]

^ that was uncanny. its like you knew they were talking about you.

[Hasbinbad]

Originally Posted by Shannacore [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

^, mostly. "stood up" is maybe not the right phrase.

Agreed.

Originally Posted by gotrocks [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

^ that was uncanny. its like you knew they were talking about you.

Tralina B'lurkin the Trollina

[Hasbinbad]

Want Tralina's opinion on something? Start talking about her on RnF, she'll be there shortly and u can ask.

[gotrocks]

Originally Posted by Hasbinbad [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Want Tralina's opinion on something? Start talking about her on RnF, she'll be there shortly and u can ask.

oddly enough this seems true

[Shannacore]

Yeah, every so often I come back and do a search for my name to see what gossipy nonsense has been going on.

I'd stop if there weren't new posts every few days~

[gotrocks]

Originally Posted by Shannacore [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Yeah, every so often I come back and do a search for my name to see what gossipy nonsense has been going on.

I'd stop if there weren't new posts every few days~

oh cmon tralalalalina, i like your posts but you aint *that* popular!

and hbb you and i both know you're grossly underestimating the ability of p99 mos eisley scum to get vagina.

or maybe its just a small percentage of us getting all the ass and raising the average [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

[Shannacore]

Originally Posted by gotrocks [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

oh cmon tralalalalina, i like your posts but you aint *that* popular!

Yes I am

Originally Posted by Kagatob [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

My girlfriend is half lesbian and wants a plaything but she's really shy and refuses to take initiative.

She's cute, short (5' nothing) and dorky as hell. Whatcha say? [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Haha, uhmmmmmmmm pass