Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecily
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I think there's a survival of the species drive behind the behavior. I definitely got questioned a lot through my 20s why I wasn't being the cocksman my best friend told me he'd be if he looked like me. I tried flirting with this drunk chick one night out with him and she was DTF, but it felt hollow and like I was just going through motions - a peacock waving it's plummage around. I passed.
Another time I was trying to comfort this woman I met who had just broken up with her bf. She falls in love with me and wants to cook me dinner because my 'im not hitting on you' routine was apparently a really good way to hit on her. Friend called her up later to clarify that I was, in fact, not hitting on her.
Funny looking back and seeing all the potential opportunities for relationships I killed with my withering apathy. That one girl who lived near Kara. My sister's ex-friend. My co-worker at pizzahut. My co-worker at Ledos. The other co-worker at Ledos who wanted me to go to prom with her. The waitress who got fired from Ledos the night I got fired from Ledos. Two single moms in college. Currently withering away affection of enby chick, which sucks because I think I am in love, but I'm still not in a place where I want to subject someone else to me.
I actually like being alone, or at least I prefer the homeostasis of it. The fling I had with my BF last year was about as happy as I've ever been and that made the breakup hurt worse.
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Thanks for sharing. This is a side of you that I havent heard before.
Relationships come with a cost. I look at my friend that is single and 35, vs myself that is married with 3 kids and sometimes i am envious of the relatively care free life he seems to enjoy. But I wouldnt trade it for what I have. It is possible that enjoyment can be found in solitude, but overall, we are meant to couple.
10-26-2019, 03:25 PM
Hybrid Mode
