Women of Norrath, what's your experience?

knix · #1 03-16-2014, 05:10 AM

When i was in my first p99 guild with another half elf female druid we are/were the only two on the sever. I often tried to engage her in feminine banter, and kept falling flat. Nice polite and friendly but, felt flat, i thought she didn't like me.

I finally had to ask her one day, Turns out she was being played by a guy, great guy. From then on I assumed that all females were played by men (but i wanted them all to be female, cause i wanted more women playing). Ran into him again while exploring Velious the other night. It was tons of fun discovering the new land with my twin druid. It was kind of like discovering something from your EQ past with someone from your p99 past.

Rhambuk · #2 03-16-2014, 09:29 AM

since when can people tell what sex you are by your avatar? or do you mean in game sex in which case i don't think it matters.

if its a problem you don't have to tell every person you meet, hi im a woman irl.

cries4hardcore · #3 03-19-2014, 09:49 PM

Hmmmm. Time to be an asshole. So female gamers don't like men treating them specially in game like men do to attractive women in rl? I'm sure most female gamers are not, frankly, particularly attractive(nor are most male gamers). Having said that, to women who have had creepy experiences. You have to realize, to make players who are hardcore and pretty much never step outside, you are the only thing close to female interaction for them. It should be pretty expected that they will form crushes and that some will be creepy and obsessive because, even if some gamers have generally matured, most tend to be sexually retarded.

JPMorgan · #4 03-19-2014, 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cries4hardcore [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

Hmmmm. Time to be an asshole. So female gamers don't like men treating them specially in game like men do to attractive women in rl? I'm sure most female gamers are not, frankly, particularly attractive(nor are most male gamers). Having said that, to women who have had creepy experiences. You have to realize, to make players who are hardcore and pretty much never step outside, you are the only thing close to female interaction for them. It should be pretty expected that they will form crushes and that some will be creepy and obsessive because, even if some gamers have generally matured, most tend to be sexually retarded.

I was thinking about this earlier. Obviously a socially inept, needy male isn't going to do well in attracting women in any situation. However, men are primarily expected to initiate dialogue with women: it's an observable cultural norm that spans nearly all walks of life. For a lot of male gamers the MMO scene serves the same purpose as a bar, library, park or work environment in as far as finding a potential partner goes.

I don't think the claim that EQ is a game, and therefore you should only be here to play, has any validity. If this were the case then the same would apply to the above environments that I listed. Aren't these the places single adults are supposed to meet one another? Does it seem irrational to seek out a potential partner with shared interests?

It just seems narrow minded to be offended by the fact that men will show interest in women who game. It's like the holy grail for a lot of guys. Finding a woman who tolerates your considerable dedication to a digital world is hard enough: finding one that wants to share it is priceless. I've had a few friends who have met their significant others over MMOs. One of those couples even met on live.

Some men are going to be bad at picking up women. Figure out how to bust their balls enough so that they leave you alone. Sounds unfair? Men have the unfair assignment of having to go out of their way to approach and impress women while risking humiliation. Some women go to the beach just to surf, others go to bars just to drink: if you're here just to game then you'll have to figure out avoid unwanted attention just like they do.

I really like how Aj put it:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ajkuhuun [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

...if it was some hot guy and not some comicon nerd coming up to flirt with you, you wouldn't have a problem with it, so cut the bullshit...

Even if it's slightly out of context, it still applies.

Sidelle · #5 03-20-2014, 05:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JPMorgan [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

I was thinking about this earlier. Obviously a socially inept, needy male isn't going to do well in attracting women in any situation. However, men are primarily expected to initiate dialogue with women: it's an observable cultural norm that spans nearly all walks of life. For a lot of male gamers the MMO scene serves the same purpose as a bar, library, park or work environment in as far as finding a potential partner goes.

I don't think the claim that EQ is a game, and therefore you should only be here to play, has any validity. If this were the case then the same would apply to the above environments that I listed. Aren't these the places single adults are supposed to meet one another? Does it seem irrational to seek out a potential partner with shared interests?

It just seems narrow minded to be offended by the fact that men will show interest in women who game. It's like the holy grail for a lot of guys. Finding a woman who tolerates your considerable dedication to a digital world is hard enough: finding one that wants to share it is priceless. I've had a few friends who have met their significant others over MMOs. One of those couples even met on live.

Some men are going to be bad at picking up women. Figure out how to bust their balls enough so that they leave you alone. Sounds unfair? Men have the unfair assignment of having to go out of their way to approach and impress women while risking humiliation. Some women go to the beach just to surf, others go to bars just to drink: if you're here just to game then you'll have to figure out avoid unwanted attention just like they do.

I really like how Aj put it:

Even if it's slightly out of context, it still applies.

In my opinion the vast majority of males here are not seriously looking to hook up irl with girls they meet in EQ. It seems silly and unfair to just assume they all want to do that. Do some of them try? Uh... Yep... but I think it's pretty rare to come across those types in game.

I've met some really cool people since I started here, guys and girls alike, who sincerely just enjoy playing the game and aren't out there looking to hook up with anyone. Though I will say this: there is some flirting that happens sometimes when guys and girls hang out together, but I pretty much view that as innocent fun and I don't take it seriously and don't think most other people do either. Same goes for real life. You throw some boys and girls together whether it's at work, school, whatever - there is gonna be some (mostly innocent) flirting.

The forums are a different story, RnF in particular... This is where the creepy/pervy stuff happens. [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.] Some of it's pretty cringeworthy but I don't take much of it seriously either.

P.S. It would be interesting if there were some statistics out there stating just how many people hook up for real in this game. It has been known to happen, that's for sure...

JPMorgan · #6 03-20-2014, 08:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidelle [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

In my opinion the vast majority of males here are not seriously looking to hook up irl with girls they meet in EQ.

I could see p99 playing host to a fewer numbers of guys looking for significant others/flings when compared to other MMOs. But, that was why I tried to phrase most of my to be about MMOs in general.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidelle [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

P.S. It would be interesting if there were some statistics out there stating just how many people hook up for real in this game. It has been known to happen, that's for sure...

I would be interested in seeing those numbers too. I'll admit that I had once when I was younger. Now it's something that I doubt that I would ever pursue again. I can just sort of relate to the guys who do feel that an MMO is capable of providing a positive environment for romance -- maybe not this MMO -- and I don't like seeing them all lumped together with the degenerates that harass strangers about their shoe size.

khanable · #7 03-20-2014, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidelle [You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]

P.S. It would be interesting if there were some statistics out there stating just how many people hook up for real in this game. It has been known to happen, that's for sure...

I personally know of 6 RL relationships that started on p99

true story