I met an older woman on craigslist

[Slashurr]

I found a posting for a married forty year old woman on craigslist that was looking to bang a younger dude. I was drunk at the time and responded to her message. I pretty much was assuming she was fake but I thought "oh what the hell"

The next day she e-mailed me back. I eventually sent her a picture and she did the same. She was actually kinda hot (always had a fantasy for banging an older woman). We agreed to meet at a local starbucks over her lunch break. We both wanted to meet in public before getting to biznass.

I met her there - - it was terrifying. I kept thinking the whole time that someone was going to bust us for one reason or another. She was a little older looking than her pictures suggested - but she was in good shape and had pretty good looking titties that definitely looked suckable. We talked for a little bit and agreed that we wanted to get together sometime for some fucking and sucking. In later e-mails, she revealed she was down with anything - anal, 69'ing, slippery lube jobs, etc.

The thing is, I am scared shitless. What if this bitch comes over to my place (she has a husband I have to host) with a big ass butcher knife and kills the shit out of me? Or what if I get her naked and it's just like "Ewwww". What the hell should I do? Would you guys fuck a woman with a husband twice your age that is reasonable attractive?

[naez]

just get drunk and then it doesnt matter what she looks like naked

[Littlegyno]

You're a fucking pussy bro.

Go packing some heat, maybe a small pistol, and go fuck your way into glory.

[naez]

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/0FcytHH7g4Q/hqdefault.jpg

[mimixownzall]

Take a half pill of viagara and it wont matter if she brings her dog... you will fuck both of them.

[Macken]

In my home town, a married woman was doing the same thing. A guy answered an add, but what he didn't know is that she had been doing this for a while and the Husband was on the trail, but hadn't caught her yet.

The guy got his pad all ready for a good time. The woman came over and after a while they started getting busy. Then the Husband busted in on them and killed them, then himself.

[Kazowi]

You're a fucking pussy bro.

Go packing some heat, maybe a small pistol, and go fuck your way into glory.

haha

[Maurk]

Just do it.

[Misto]

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

- Her husband finds out and flays you alive.
- You get herpes.

[Alawen Everywhere]

What's more pathetic than two ugly people hooking up on craigslist?

One of them not having the sack to do the deed.

[Walk]

beat those guts

[dredge]

I have thought about responding to ads like that before but thought, what kind of woman puts an ad on craigslist for sex???

She must be a total wack o.

Especially sense all a woman has to do to find sex is go to a bar at last call and guys will line up to hit on them.

But seriously seems weird, but we live in weird times.

[Ledzepp02]

Or what if I get her naked and it's just like "Ewwww". What the hell should I do?

Made me lol XD

[Zadrian]

You guys are totally missing the point here...

www.womenbehindbars.com

[Simonlol]

Or what if I get her naked and it's just like "Ewwww". Then just fuck her facehole.

[Ihealyou]

Then just fuck her facehole.

What if her teeth are yellow and she has bad breath?

[Ledzepp02]

What if her teeth are yellow and she has bad breath?

http://i474.photobucket.com/albums/rr107/Ledzepp_wow/post-lava.jpg

[naez]

Doug was in the Army, cleaning up after KP duty or some such janitorial nonsense. He was washing up different items and added ammonia to a substance that already contained substantial bleach. After feeling fine for a good half hour, not realizing what he had done, he started to feel woozy, and eventually fainted with a loud thud. Thankfully, people in the other room came in to see what had happened to him.

He wakes up in the hospital later that night. The doctor comes in and greets him, and asks him how's he's feeling. Short of a small headache Doug says he's doing fairly well. The next question took him off quite off-guard:

"You're quite lucky. You smoke, don't you?"

Doug looked at him a little funny. "Lucky? Yeah, I smoke a few a day..."

"It saved your life." The doctor responded. "The years of smoking covered your lungs with a normally life-threatening tar substance, which you probably already knew. However, you have been given a second chance... your lungs are as pink as the day you were born. No permanent damage"

Doug and the Army doctor were astounded. The gasses formed from the cleaners had burned off the tar and crap in Doug's lungs, leaving them unscathed and actually healthier than before. The one ironically healthy use of smoking, maybe. So bleach and ammonia do make a Super Cleaner, but only for your lungs... and please for all that is good and holy in this world, do NOT try this at home.

Even though he got his second chance, Doug still smokes Marbs to this day.

-

tl;dr: use chlorine gas to burn that stench off your dick

[Bruno]

Just do it.

What this guy said.

This is actually pretty common. My friends have done this numerous times (both male and female). The relationships don't last long, but usually you get to fuck.

[Asher]

The thing is, I am scared shitless. What if this bitch comes over to my place (she has a husband I have to host) with a big ass butcher knife and kills the shit out of me?

Never bring her to your house. Isn't this why God made motels?

Be sure to report back to us after you do the deed. I have to hear the end of this story. :)

Asher

[Supreme]

If you have to ask you are too young.

[Spewys]

Dude...do it in the back of her car first. Then u can easily get out. Totally works for me.

Funny shit though.. Goodluck.

[Massive Marc]

Did he bang this bitch yet or what ?

[hedbonker]

Key element: Do not take her to your place.

[dredge]

unless it's to the secrete dungeon room/ bomb shelter

[KilyenaMage]

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2693/4370715295_03ee63911f.jpg

[naez]

those some nice beef curtains

[Animosity]

My GOD this thread is GREASY :3

[xnolanx]

that looks tasty

[Bruno]

I could kill you for posting that picture. I'm so hungry right now.

[KilyenaMage]

Remember, especially in the case of sex with the elderly....you have GOT to lick it before you stick it.

[Nuggie]

I found a posting for a married forty year old woman on craigslist that was looking to bang a younger dude. I was drunk at the time and responded to her message. I pretty much was assuming she was fake but I thought "oh what the hell"

The next day she e-mailed me back. I eventually sent her a picture and she did the same. She was actually kinda hot (always had a fantasy for banging an older woman). We agreed to meet at a local starbucks over her lunch break. We both wanted to meet in public before getting to biznass.

I met her there - - it was terrifying. I kept thinking the whole time that someone was going to bust us for one reason or another. She was a little older looking than her pictures suggested - but she was in good shape and had pretty good looking titties that definitely looked suckable. We talked for a little bit and agreed that we wanted to get together sometime for some fucking and sucking. In later e-mails, she revealed she was down with anything - anal, 69'ing, slippery lube jobs, etc.

The thing is, I am scared shitless. What if this bitch comes over to my place (she has a husband I have to host) with a big ass butcher knife and kills the shit out of me? Or what if I get her naked and it's just like "Ewwww". What the hell should I do? Would you guys fuck a woman with a husband twice your age that is reasonable attractive?

I don't have time to read the rest of teh responses, so:

Generally, I'd stay away from married chicks. Just saying.

[Kambris]

If this was the middle-east you would soooo get busted under Sharia law and lashed to death.

[Alawen Everywhere]

Remember, especially in the case of sex with the elderly....you have GOT to lick it before you stick it.

This is why God made Astroglide.

[SlankyLanky]

the older the berry the sweeter the juice.

[mimixownzall]

Remember: If she asks if you like blue waffles...


RUN FOR THE HILLS

[Chanur]

Post her picture so we can decide.

[Pyrocat]

What's more pathetic than two ugly people hooking up on craigslist?

One of them not having the sack to do the deed.

speaking from experience?

[DetroitVelvetSmooth]

Put it in her butt and pee. She said anything. (Though this is harder than you might think - hydrate to the max bro!)

[hedbonker]

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww162/Cookie-boy_photos/BikiniLine-1.jpg

[Ongbak]

bait n fake

[Misto]

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww162/Cookie-boy_photos/BikiniLine-1.jpg

WHAT THE FUCK

[mipstien]

http://i.imgur.com/LN6ky.png

[mipstien]

link to the post but had to post pic incase this gets taken down
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/mis/2268834840.html

[OngorDrakan]

http://www.truecrimereport.com/2011/04/timothy_brooks_breaks_into_hot.php