You are perfect

[commed]

yall ever have your baby die so you snort pills and get black out drunk every day for weeks? ya me to but uhh i masturbated for the first time since it happened so things are getting better i think

[Mead]

this has lulz sect written all over it

[commed]

Fuck lulz

[Pokesan]

did u check ur butthole?

[commed]

i have one pill left so i figured it was time to talk

[commed]

check my butt for my dead baby? haha naw

[Baler]

https://i.imgur.com/5bHgNhK.gif

[commed]

fuck you guys i aint making this shit up

[Rivera]

is it lame to say in before lock?

it is isn't it?

[Pokesan]

sorry i thought it was a metaphor

my condolences BT

[Lhancelot]

Is this a Kerwin troll account?

[commed]

i dont even know that fucker

[commed]

this is my account i have literally only made 23 posts on the forum since oct 2010

[commed]

also if i cant talk about my dead baby here where the fuck am i suppose to

[Rivera]

this is my account i have literally only made 23 posts on the forum since oct 2010 and you're making them count. respect

[Lhancelot]

also if i cant talk about my dead baby here where the fuck am i suppose to

Maybe in the Off-Topic section? This is RANTS and FLAMES. Not exactly the place to go for psychological/emotional support.

[commed]

im pissed off tho this is where to post when fucking angry

[Lulz~Sect]

My condolences OP

[commed]

hey lulz fuck you

[Mead]

lol

[Lulz~Sect]

Why?

[commed]

because your bald and tucock is more handsome

[Lulz~Sect]

😂👌🏽

[skarlorn]

This is absolutely NUCLEAR

OP is clearly on drugs and mentally unstable for good reason.

I hope u are masturbating to psychically healthy things like videos of crowbars being dropped into rusty steel buckets.

U may need to seek help

[commed]

hey skarlorn do you like soda pop?

[Lhancelot]

hey lulz fuck you

rofl

[commed]

how about you soda pop deez nuts in ya mouf

[Lulz~Sect]

<Dial A Dad>

[commed]

ill call your dad and get him to bust a nut over the phone

[Lhancelot]

ill call your dad and get him to bust a nut over the phone

This reminds me of Originalman. Xaanka, is that you?!

[skarlorn]

I don't like soda pop.

[commed]

my balls in your mouth offer still stands no matter your stance on soda

[Pokesan]

i need a burrito in my mouth

[skarlorn]

hoping this post finds u well

[commed]

shout out to el charro tequila shits so cheap and it gets you drunk if you drink it

[skarlorn]

shout out to el charro tequila shits so cheap and it gets you drunk if you drink it

i humbly request more of your poetry

[Lhancelot]

shout out to el charro tequila shits so cheap and it gets you drunk if you drink it

One time when I was in the army, me and my friend Julio decided to stay in his barracks on a Friday night and finish off a bottle of Tequila.

We drank the bottle empty, and I fell asleep only after I noticed I was the only one singing drunkenly to a VHS music video Julio had played for us to watch/listen and eventually sing to.

I woke up on the floor with my head on a huge chair seat cushion I had pulled off a chair to use as a buffer between myself and the floor. I immediately recognized that my head and face was covered in a smelly, sticky substance that clearly was a mixture of vodka and food that had been eaten through the night... I had vomited all over the chair cushion and my head was laying in the pool of of it.

I jumped up quickly, disgusted and embarassed that I had created this huge mess. I thought to myself, holy shit that's the last time I ever drink tequila... I grabbed the cushion, and washed it in Julio's shower then quickly took it out to dry in the hot and humid morning sun.

Still tired and wasted, I decided to lay back down on the floor where I thought I would catch a few more winks before Julio my friend would wake up and drive me back to my unit barracks.

Right as I began to close my eyes, the door to Julio's barracks room opened and it was his roommate. As he entered the room to grab some things he needed, he said "Holy shit, it stinks in here did someone get sick in here or what?"

Before I could answer, Julio obviously half asleep and still half drunk mumbled "Ahhh dude, I dunno..." Julio then looked to the side of the bed and then said, "I thought I got sick but shit... I guess not..." Then nervously laughed as our eyes met.

[commed]

i dont get it

[Lhancelot]

i dont get it

See. I didn't get it either, literally for years.

It was years later I recounted the scenario in my head then it all made sense.

The fact of the matter was, when I awoke I did not feel sick at all on that early summer morning.

I couldn't recall getting sick either, but I was very, very drunk so figured perhaps the tequila had wiped my memories away.

It did not.

[commed]

hmm

[Lulz~Sect]

shout out to el charro tequila shits so cheap and it gets you drunk if you drink it

[Lhancelot]

hmm

You still don't get what happened? :(

[Lulz~Sect]

The last time I drank tequila I woke up in a different state
Apparently I was drunkenly charming enough To convince two blondes to take me home

(inb4 u def mad) 😏

[Lammy]

Sorry for your loss. I hope you find a way to harness the energy into something positive.

[Lhancelot]

hmm

See man. All the time I thought I got sick and vomited on myself... waking in my own pool of spew and it was actually my friend Julio who leaned over his bedside, and threw up on my head!

He thought he got sick and motioned as if he had thrown up on the other side when he was talking to his roommate, when in actuality he had leaned over to his right and I was sleeping below his bunk bed on that seat cushion!

I never got sick! MY FRIEND JULIO DID!!!!!!!

He accidentally threw up on me, and I didn't even realize it because I myself was passed out drunk. :mad:

[Lulz~Sect]

My tequila story is exponentially > urs

[Lhancelot]

My tequila story is exponentially > urs

It's definitely more enjoyable, but my story had mystery to it I just didn't present it well enough I guess. :(

[skarlorn]

Dude Lhance after all these years you still don't realize realize what happened? Julio was leaning in to kiss you and then suddenly vomited from drunkenness and cognitive dissonance towards his own repressed homosexuality and overwhelming attraction for you.

[Lulz~Sect]

Vomit cum 🤢

[commed]

chugged 10 beers since i made this post

[Lulz~Sect]

Bottle of wine
Half a bottle of baileys
Time 4 bed

[Zekayy]

K

[commed]

fuck today sucks out of drugs

[Lulz~Sect]

I’m drunk and On my way! to score some coke

[Shrubwise]

I’m drunk and On my way! to score some coke

Lol'ing at the iPhone On my way! autocorrect

[Lhancelot]

Bottle of wine
Half a bottle of baileys
Time 4 bed

I am trying to figure out ways to use Bailey's Irish Cream, any actual ideas? I mean use as in consume/drink it, you know what to mix it in. :D

[skarlorn]

Lol'ing at the iPhone On my way! autocorrect

*tips fedora to THAT*

Dear Lulz, Sorry you bought cocaine. I hope you feel physically bad today and remember why it's not good for you to do cocaine.

How are you today, commed?

I have shit three times, done a yoga class, and drank 4 cups of coffee w/ breakfast.

Geetting a late start at work today but that's okay sometimes!

[Jimjam]

Sorry for your loss. I hope you find a way to harness the energy into something positive.

The only human response so far... QFT

I hope you have managed to binge away the edge off the dark place you are currently in so can now move away from the drug orgy and bring some order back into your life.

My deepest sympathies.

[Lhancelot]

The only human response so far... QFT

I hope you have managed to binge away the edge off the dark place you are currently in so can now move away from the drug orgy and bring some order back into your life.

My deepest sympathies.

This is a lie. I greeted his anger and unhappiness with misdirection and a personal story of my own to try to lighten his mood!

It's hard to change gears in RnF and recognize what is a troll post or not sometimes and thus in reality none of the responses were inhuman at all.

Seen much worse tbh.

[skarlorn]

hey jimjam do you like soda ?

[commed]

to be honest i wanted people to come in and talk shit to me so i could tell em all to get fucked the responses have been a lot better than expected

[skarlorn]

what you really wanted was a medley of aggressive shit posting mixed with moments of deep human connection in an organic format to entertain u while touching on the heart of compassion currently submerged beneath a tarpaulin of sedatives

[commed]

yes

[Jimjam]

L:I did enjoy your story of getting puked on!

Filbert: I'm not sure of the subtext to this question, but I have started a new weekend job at a fantasy themed / dwarven drinking hall bar.

It's got troll hide maps and severed orc heads on the wall. Shields and weapons. Pretty gnarly.

[Lhancelot]

Dude Lhance after all these years you still don't realize realize what happened? Julio was leaning in to kiss you and then suddenly vomited from drunkenness and cognitive dissonance towards his own repressed homosexuality and overwhelming attraction for you.

I missed this post.

That could be true, but as far as I know Julio was 100% hetero.

He did end up leaving the army, and eventually went on to become an actor in Hollywood. No kidding, last he told me he was is in a play. He even had a very tiny part in the movie Santa Claus 2 as well as Cloverfield.

I seen his part in Cloverfield but never seen the movie Santa Claus 2. In Cloverfield, he literally blips on the screen as one of the soldiers during a stressful moment in the movie and blips away.

[Jimjam]

In Cloverfield, he literally blips on the screen as one of the soldiers during a stressful moment in the movie and blips away.

Is 'blip' Americanese for vomit?

I really hope he is a vomity squadie in the movie.

[Lhancelot]

Is 'blip' Americanese for vomit?

I really hope he is a vomity squadie in the movie.

No, I mean he literally flashes on the screen a half second and then is off lol. Safe to say his part in Cloverfield was minimal. :)

[skarlorn]

i'm here for you commed you filthy piece of shit PM pics of ur ass hole

[skarlorn]

Filbert: I'm not sure of the subtext to this question, but I have started a new weekend job at a fantasy themed / dwarven drinking hall bar.


how about you soda pop deez nuts in ya mouf

[Jimjam]

Cor blimey! Coming on a little fresh there, guvnor!

I do like me some honeyed nuts tho. We sell some at the bar. And Cockatrice burgers.

[Lulz~Sect]

I was merely drunk trolling.

[skarlorn]

Merry Xmas to one depressed retard, commed. Congrats hope u fap to Xmas themed porn

[Riddick]

yall ever have your baby die so you snort pills and get black out drunk every day for weeks? ya me to but uhh i masturbated for the first time since it happened so things are getting better i think

If that's for real then you need to get help. Pills and drinking won't help the situation, its most definitely negatively affecting the people around you. Things happen in life, and its rarely fair, its up to you to handle the situation as it stands today, and move forward.

I have no experience in the matter, but from an outside perspective, mourn for a while but then move forward with life, you never know what amazing new experiences wait just around the corner.

[commed]

Merry Christmas yall i got some cool toys to play with

[Mead]

Lol'ing at the iPhone On my way! autocorrect

I disabled this shit

Drove me fucking bonkers

[Lulz~Sect]

who the fuck types out OMW anyway

stupid