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Estu
11-08-2010, 09:38 PM
Like the lion is the king of the jungle, the banana is pretty much the king of the fruit.

First, the taste is nice and mild - it doesn't overpower you with flavor, which lends it to being used in combination with other foods more effectively. If you share my distaste for those salads with pieces of mandarin in them, you know what I mean: you eat those and the fucking tiny orange is all you taste. Fuck that shit, IMO. You toss some bananas in cereal, it's a nice subtle addition. They make awesome bread and are pretty much (along with berries) the prototypical delicious fruit shake ingredient.

Second, the texture is pretty much ideal. Maybe this is even the top thing about the banana to me. They're soft, they're not wet, they cut easily. They don't explode in your mouth like some kind of juice grenade like some berries and like those fucking tiny tomatoes you see in some salads. They're easy to eat and don't require excessive biting and chewing. Pretty much mainly due to their texture, they are the perfect addition to ice cream, in the form of the banana split. I don't know how they do it, but they stay nice and warm when surrounded by ice cream - you cut a piece off with your spoon easy as pie, pop it in your mouth, and experience a veritable symphony of taste, temperature, and texture composed of banana, ice cream, and hot fudge (BITCH YOU'D BETTER HAVE SOME HOT FUDGE UP IN THERE).

Third, ease of use and lack of mess. Open that shit up, hold it by the peel, finish eating, throw away. No cutting it up like a melon, no cores or seeds to deal with, no hands covered in juice, no debate as to what parts you should eat and what parts you should leave alone, like with watermelons where you're never sure just how close you want to get to the rind. Not to mention, it lets you know exactly when it's ready for eating. When it gets yellow with those little brown dots all over the peel, it's pretty much ready to give you a taste orgasm.

The only real downside of the banana is that it's only at optimal ripeness for a day or so. Those of us with refined palates know that you don't eat a banana when it's all yellow - you gotta wait for the brown dots to pop up. But you can't wait too long either, because you don't want the gross brown gunk getting into your banana. I would argue, however, that the same probably applies to a lot of other fruit as well, but they don't show their ripeness as easily as the banana does.

Next week: Carrots are the best vegetable.

William_Munny15
11-08-2010, 09:59 PM
Banana's can't even fuck with the nectarine

Lazortag
11-08-2010, 10:44 PM
best fruits:

pears
pineapples
apples (yellow ones particularly)
estu
grapes

Ihealyou
11-08-2010, 11:03 PM
If its the best fruit, why does it make the worst candy?

xshayla701
11-08-2010, 11:07 PM
If its the best fruit, why does it make the worst candy?

you are the expert of fruit

Hasbinbad
11-08-2010, 11:21 PM
http://gardenmonsters.org/plants%20and%20pocket%20and%20pumpkins%20045.jpg

Japan
11-08-2010, 11:24 PM
Banana texture is shit-tier, eat oranges baby.

PS: resize your image, nobody wants to see 9999x9999 of shitty hasbinbad post

Estu
11-09-2010, 12:04 AM
best fruits:

pears
pineapples
apples (yellow ones particularly)
estu
grapes

I knew from the moment I conceived this thread that someone was going to make this joke. I'm glad it was you. <3

This is kind of like how at the end of Of Mice And Men (spoilers) George shoots Lenny in the head because he knows Lenny is going to get killed by an angry mob soon so he wants to make his death quick and painless.

Hasbinbad
11-09-2010, 12:04 AM
the point was that it would be large..

..i thought that would come acress, seeing as how LARGE the picture is..

Estu
11-09-2010, 12:08 AM
Banana texture is shit-tier, eat oranges baby.

Citrus fruits have always been too explodey for me. And they have that weird shit going in where there's like juice but then you have to chew some chewy shit that contains the juice and you have to pick at the rind, it's just kind of a pain. I love me some Valencia orange juice, though.

Abacab niggah
11-09-2010, 12:39 AM
Hasbin, you're not black how can you possibly love the melon so much?

Trademaster
11-09-2010, 01:08 AM
Hasbin, you're not black how can you possibly love the melon so much?


Wait, who doesn't like nice firm melons?

OngorDrakan
11-09-2010, 01:15 AM
Wait boobs? GREAT!

Also, Bananas can be used to fuck things. Just saying.

Also why R&F? You wanted the phallic discussion?

Hasbinbad
11-09-2010, 01:25 AM
Hasbin, you're not black how can you possibly love the melon so much?
I'm black Irish, dawg.

Fourthmeal
11-09-2010, 02:40 AM
Best fruit: Double Decker Tacos

fishingme
11-09-2010, 02:58 AM
Best fruit: Double Decker Tacos

+1 think outside the titties

Omnimorph
11-09-2010, 08:27 AM
Bananas are pretty great.

I'm a blueberry fan myself though.

Estu
11-09-2010, 09:43 AM
Also why R&F? You wanted the phallic discussion?

You of all people should know me well enough to understand the joke. Never mind though!!

OngorDrakan
11-09-2010, 03:05 PM
Four paragraphs Estu. FOUR. It's not a joke to you, it's RL.

guineapig
11-09-2010, 03:25 PM
Best fruits include:

Tomato: Because people forget that it's a fruit (well a botanical fruit). :p

Red Pepper: Same reason as above... PLUS They make paprika out of it and that's the most important ingredient in all Hungarian cooking. ;)

Corn: Because they can make plastics out of it!!! :eek:

Ugli fruit: Because of the name, DUH! :D

Avocado: Because guacamole is serious business!

VictoryARC
11-09-2010, 03:55 PM
Bananas are up there, but id have to rank grapes as #1. Red wine being my reason ;-)

Estu
11-09-2010, 05:31 PM
Four paragraphs Estu. FOUR. It's not a joke to you, it's RL.

That's part of the joke. You just don't appreciate my complex comical sensibilities~

Yinaltin
11-09-2010, 07:26 PM
your mother !
your mother eats pumpkin jogurth ...
with whole fruits .

Azazel
11-09-2010, 07:36 PM
Yeah bananas are great, both sexes can use them to pleasure themselves. Additionally they help prove the existance of God !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qq7LXn4KSrM

Swishahouse
11-09-2010, 08:13 PM
Avocado: Because guacamole is serious business!



TRUTH~

karsten
11-11-2010, 11:31 AM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v620/theweaselking/main5/7c567a8b.jpg

Lanvaren
11-11-2010, 12:16 PM
With a traffic light, green means go, yellow means slow down..

But with a banana, it's the exact opposite. Green means, hold on and yellow means, go ahead. Red means, where the fuck did you get that banana at?

Aadill
11-11-2010, 12:21 PM
Hi, Mitch.

Also: I am eating a banana RIGHT. NOW.

azeth
11-11-2010, 12:31 PM
Anyone else see Japan has been banned?

guineapig
11-11-2010, 12:51 PM
Anyone else see Japan has been banned?

Had him on ignore, for real? :)

purist
11-11-2010, 01:32 PM
Anyone else see Japan has been banned?

suspended* for whatever he posted in the veteran's day thread in Offtopic I'd venture to guessing

Linachan
11-13-2010, 08:24 AM
Truth!