Quote:
Originally Posted by DeliciousHalflings
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95% of people p99 are socially inept dipshits with bad hygiene & a fear of any conflict beyond their keyboard. They can't mouth off to anyone IRL without severe risk of injury or embarrassment
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I am almost tempted to give you my real name, and tell you to call up the Cleveland PD.
Frequent flyer. I moved right before covid, so no more C-land, but the past three years, these local cops been trying to angle me into a "we had no choice" situation. 7 times. The kountry kops never seen someone who is logical and very clear on property rights. It's funny what they get the hicks to believe they have authority to do. They don't lol.
I caught the local police chief in phone sex w/ a hooker. Hooker was giving me attitude for trying to walk around her car parked too far into the crosswalk. Bitch says, "Do you know who I'm on the phone with?" I say, no. Simon LeBon? "The police chief!"
Alright, sure. She is holding the phone out her window at me on speaker so I go "tell this bitch to park right officer" and tell them both to go fuck themselves.
I been in town maybe 3 months. I don't know who the police chief is, nor do I car. SUV scretches around corner, civilian car, guy jumps out telling me to "Leave her alone!" He's wearing a t-shirt and running shorts and flip flops and an obvious woody.
"I'm the police chief!"
"I'm from fucking goddam Cleveland. I hear that from someone I need to see ID. All I see is an erection." Hooker gets out of car. Spaghetti dress can see her damn ass crack and it's a Sunday morning! Sabbath! "You leave him alone!"
So I got the police chief (so-claimed) and an angry hooker on me. Four cop cars -- the town only has like 6, converge and I end up in a cell telling the officer his boss is just pissed I interrupted his Lord's Day phone sex. I'm bleeding all over the floor because, when the hooker saw the cop cars, she got into her car but put it in drive instead of reverse and hit me and left a nasty gash.
As this entire episode drew to a close, about 3 hours later, after I informed them I had a medical condition that required immediate care, and I know my rights etc., I told all the officers in the room, "I got you guys so bad. Suck my dick and go fuck your wife if she'll have it" and walked out the front door of the downtown precinct.
A week later two cars pull into my front yard, lights all searching. "Are you from XXXX Sir?? Please do not move."
They had sent the two female officers on a prank call.
"You guys do not realize I am not an idiot, do you. The law tells me I have a right to see why you thought I was from xxxx and came here with guns drawn. Why this address? I know the Mayor. My family is from this town. My grandparents married here. And you guys truly and verily suck."
Lot of bullshit, I have no idea what this town is about, I just move weight. Stamps. I'm a stamp collector. Underground stuff.
They apologized and left.
Think they finally learned their lesson. I wave at them. Scratch the corner of my eye using my middle finger.
What? You never scratched the inside corner of your eye using your middle finger?
You're welcome.
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