If you're able to run eqgame.exe, something else is wrong. I know that myself and plenty of others can run it just fine. Try making it a shortcut on your desktop, and make *sure* that this is added to the end of it.
eqgame.exe" patchme
Honestly, you may want to reinstall, and follow all the setup instructions found at project1999.org
**edit**
the correct eqhost is:
Host=login.eqemulator.net:5998
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