Quote:
Originally Posted by Estu
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I think the issue is that the word 'love' is used for a variety of separate feelings. I think 'romantic love' is definitely its own thing and is definitely affected by sexual orientation.
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You must be talking about infatuation.
You know my brother says that love for a woman is spiritual. He says "beautiful" does not describe it. He said it's indefinable. But you know I can say the same thing about love for god. Or love for the universe. The fact that it's indefinable to him tells me that his thoughts about it are about as good as if he told me the earth was flat. How can you have a reliable opinion about something that's indefinable?????
I'm not convinced that love for a woman is a special love. It might be a flavor of love, but it's still love. There could be some love's that're more survivable than others, though. For example, if I loved knives, I might get cut one too many times. On the other hand, some woman are supposed to cut both ways...
Infatuation is kind of idealistic too. Now that I think about it. But all love is an idea.
When I was growing up I had infatuation a couple times. But I can assure you that it's mostly superficial. Deeper love happens when the object of your infatuation loses its luster. If you like a gentle curve then it's no longer gentle. If you like a mark here and a mark there then the marks aren't there anymore. If you like a square in the middle then there's a circle in its place. If you're attracted to woman and you can be infatuated with an old plum wobbly on her legs in her advanced age then you have found love my friend.
As you grow old, you increasingly discover that everything you worked so hard for is slowly taken away from you. And people and things you love pass on. It's hard to accept, but it happens to everyone. You're forced to dig deeper for purpose and meaning. Nature urges us to keep one foot in front of the other.
A love for the universe is bittersweet, as you must account for everything, good and bad. So I think love is an idea. But deep love is not just an idea, it's a lot of ideas in one place. It's complex.
Love is like wine. The longer it sits, the deeper its taste. Well, somewhat. Love is deeper with time.