It has been: 0 days since seeing a client high out of his goddamn mind hanging dong fully nude
Client calls and says he’s just done alcohol and fentanyl less than 2 hours ago, and is interested in rehab. I’m like ooooook why can’t you give him resources for that over the phone? Why I am being sent out for this? All I do is get on Google and write a few down anyway. Whatever. I could build the biggest waste case and bury the dispatching agency. I could take my case to the regional behavioral health authority and BURY them. And I will if they ever try to fuck me. “Don’t you ever try to fuck me, Tony”
So I get to this dude’s house and am knocking and ringing the doorbell and no answer. So I look through the window and can see him putzing around in the backyard with no shirt on (he was actually nude but I couldn’t see waist down). And he’s ignoring my knocks and rings. So I try calling his phone and of course it’s turned off
So I contact the dispatching agency to ask why the F this guy isn’t coming to the door for a service HE requested, and as I’m on the phone with them I go “oh Jesus, nevermind, he came out”. And there was his fat naked ass standing in his front yard selling hotdogs
So I approach and am like do you want to talk? Blank stare. Do you remember calling? He says no. That and him saying he was looking for his lighter were the only two things he ever said to anyone. After that he started putzing his bare ass around his patio which was in complete disarray, chairs knocked over, trash everywhere. Every other question I asked he didn’t seem to understand. He just kept looking and looking. I’m like “Ok, I’m going to give you a few minutes to get situated and check back in”. I could see into his house as he went back in and was thinking damn your place is THRASHED. Chairs all knocked over and broken, looked like he had been robbed or something…
Then I go to the work van and call the fire department and tell them he appears to be highly highly intoxicated and stuporous. He doesn’t seem to understand anything I say. As I’m waiting for the fire department to show up, he comes out with pants on. He runs up to the van so I roll the window down. And he can’t figure out how to form words so he just runs back into the house. Whatever, at least he put some pants on
But when the fire department got there he was back to BUCK ASS NEKKID. And he’s not coming to the door at first. So they’re like “are you sure he wants our help” and I’m like “he presents as having no idea what he wants. He doesn’t seem to understand anything. I just don’t want me with limited medical training to be the last person to see this guy and have him overdose 30 minutes after I leave”
That made the fire captain’s eyes widen a bit as he realized that this now would be them instead. So they continue to knock and he eventually comes out. He doesn’t seem to understand them either
I mention that his energy level is surprisingly high considering he reported having alcohol mixed with fentanyl, that combo would normally knock someone out. I said this as he was taking his hat on and off his head about 15 times in two minutes. I said I bet he’s has a stimulant in the mix there, my guess is meth. He seems to have some meth ants in his pants, if you know what I mean. Then I corrected myself and said “meth ants in his lack of pants I mean” which got them laughing
Anyway they took him to the ER and I went and coordinated. Prior to this it was almost a full year since seeing a client hanging dong
[You must be logged in to view images. Log in or Register.]