I probably won't understand. I wanted to be with someone so bad once
Some how I blacked out. And I hope that I didn't hurt anyone 🙏
When I came too I was still alive and everyone was safe. We broke up after that. There wasn't much drama. What got me through it was knowing they would be safer and happier without me. And I was able to move on. I didn't know it at the time. I'm happier now too. And I needed the freedom. To grow and flower into the new world I'm in now ✨.
And I hope they are too.
Being able to say I love you without needing anything. And able to say I love you and let go at the same time. Is good. Don't want to hurt the people we love. When we are rejected. We should be open to the good experience we can have afterwards walking away from that with loving kindness. For ourselves and others. Sometimes people just aren't ready. Sometimes they are and the universe. Destiny just has something else in store. Attachments can be really painful.
You deserve to feel good whether you are with someone or not or your dream person or not.
As for me. I'm the long run. I've learned I'm a painful person to be with sometimes. Yet I have found absolute happiness in solitude. No need to brush my teeth everyday. Or epilate my legs. When I feel sick. No one is dependent on me. No kids are going to suffer because I couldn't get outta bed today. And I have different opportunities.
I'm talking about myself a lot cuz I can't talk shit about you. I hardly know most ppl here. And those I do I'm not putting their lives on display for others to become attached too.
I know this is terribly rambling and incoherent. Butt I really hope this helps!