I priorities in this order hp/ac/cha/int.
I put int last because it is very easy to get to acceptable levels.
you mentioned your charming a fair bit...
depends on how your charming... get yourself a charm kit.
-silver jacinth wedding ring or adamantine rings
-rusty spiked shoulder pads
-two weapons
-cheap haste item
give the items to the charmed critter. Note you will lose the items if your pet dies to an npc or the server disconnects.
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