I'm a bit hungry so I just wanted to mention Turkey.
Professor Obama. So stenorial, lecturing. He needlessly antagonized Erdrogan with human rights bullshit just when we needed them. He ruined our relationship so much the Turks turned off the power to Incirlik Air Base under the pretense of rooting out some traitors. The most important air base in the Middle East, maybe the world. In constant use by USAF since 1955 and home to over 4k personnel and most importantly, 50 shiny nuclear weapons. Sorry it's so dark, we're looking for some coup plotters. Or maybe the Americans are really upset about those reporters and protesters and have something to do with all this. Hang tight.
Trump met with the guy, he glad-handed him and gave him a nice dinner for sure, showed him around; the best of friends. Go look at the pictures Erdrogan looks happy as shit. (A week or so ago Erdrogan declared the Hagia Sophia a mosque again and Trump didn't say shit. I'm sure Obama would go on and on about fundamentalism and lectures about fomenting sectarian strife). I'm sure Erdrogan came with a long list of things he would love to have and Trump made all his dreams come true. Just don't attack the Israelites, please. We're going to need you to do something for us later, don't worry about it now though. How about that Dubai though, right?
Now the Turks are doing all the heavy lifting in Libya for us since the Egyptians can't be trusted to stay Egyptians and besides they're backing the wrong horse. The Turks took responsibility for their Syrian area and all of sudden we're not having any problems there. Do you know why you haven't heard anything from the poor oppressed Kurds and how badly the Turks are mistreating them? Because Obama's foreign service isn't out there amplifying their terrorist propaganda. Trump dropped support for them fast, good riddance to those trouble making dweebs. Like Trump said, they weren't with us in Normandy. I mean neither were the Turks but rightly we need to support the most moderate and also the most stable and powerful Muslim nation, if we have to support any. Turkey has been a solid NATO ally since 1952 all the while knowing they're gonna take hot nukes up the Istanbul in any real war since they hosted nukes themselves. And how do we repay them? Oh you're arresting too many reporters. Erdrogan was probably too polite to provide a list of Obama-separated children.
What's my point? Trump is a genius. A stable one. The stability comes from having hours and hours of executive time, time you and I (I especially) might waste trying to build a proper magma forge in Dwarf Fortress, but time that Trump uses to see the future, like Dr. Manhattan. And the genius comes from distilling a very complex situation and synthesizing all the information and using the simplest communication method (out of the past 15 presidents as measured on the Flesch-Kincaid grade level scale) to get shit done. When a fourth-grader tells you what he wants you to do, you understand exactly so you go to the pony store and get him a pony. When the professor wants something, it's like you think you remembered all those words and what he said, but he just went on and on. In the end you were kind of left with a feeling he was talking so much because he wanted to fuck you. So you go and make friends with some smelly Kurd.
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