This is pretty cool, lemme give it a go.
So we all go through the "playing with fire" phase as a kid, right? Not just me? So when I was younger, I did in fact have this issue.
It all began at my grandmother's house, her fireplace in fact, she asked me to go start a fire up. It was EZ-lite logs and paper. Woosh! Flame on! Obsession on! After starting that fire, I figured I would hold onto that lighter just in case she needed me to start another one... Riiiight. So I go home later and immediately go to my room and look for things to burn. But where am I going to burn things? I can't do it in here, there is a smoke detector. My room opened up to our deck in the back yard so I figured if I was quiet enough opening the door, no big deal! So I grab an empty peanut canister that held random junk in it and went out and filled it with random flamable materials and lit it up! Woosh! So awesome.
I continued with this tradition for about a month or so with only a couple of close calls. Questions of smelling something burning and such. "Nah, I don't smell anything." They would never find my burning can either, it was hidden in my closet amongst some baseball card boxes. No worries!
So at this point it's getting pretty bad, I couldn't not burn stuff. Im getting braver and taking my burn can to my grandma's house where I spend a bunch of time. I found a hiding spot for my burn can there too. Under the guest bed tucked in the frame. I'm a genius!
So at my grandma's house I decide, screw the can, I'm outside, let's find something. I'm on her deck looking for targets. Target acquired! Dried plants that my grandma has for decoration. I'll just burn one of those little pieces!
WRONG!
The damn thing went up in a huge flash of light and not only was it quick but the whole bush! But most unsettling was the fact that not only was the dried plant in fire, but the wall of her house! I'm scrambling! Water! Water! I need water! I found her plant watering pitcher and quickly went to the hose, filled it up and started dousing the flames. I made about 3 or 4 of these trips. Completely terrified of course.
I got the fire out. Nobody came out. No alarms. Nothing. Phew. So I go inside, grab a glass of water and sit down trying to think of how to explain the burn marks going up the side of grandma's house. But before I can think of anyhing my mom shows up and asks how I'm doing. "Fine" I said. She comes up to me, grabs my face with eyes huuuuge enough to see through me. "What happened to your eyebrows?!?!?!"
What? My eyebrows?? What do you mean my eye......... Ohhhhh shit.
"You smell like smoke"
"What were you doing outside"
"Come outside!"
"What the f#!$ did you do?"
Busted. The worst part is I tried to lie about it, thought it was working too. Even with my singed off eyebrows! But then they found my burn can...
So yeah, no eyebrows, burn can in hand, scorched wall, I was done.
Aside from the lecture, I got my ass whooped. Then made to do 2000 sentences. "I will not play with or start fires." Plus they thought I needed Jesus and made me go to church.
Pretty funny in hindsight. Glad I didn't burn down grandma's house though! However, whenever I go camping I always have the same thought when I go to make the camp fire... I will not play with or start fires.
|