Need before greed generally doesn't make sense in pickup groups because EverQuest is very poorly itemized. It's insanely imbalanced and there's practically zero rhyme or reason to any of it. It's because of this that instead of adopting a need before greed ruleset in which someone could walk away with a 90k spell, or a 60k cloak, or a 20k earring and so forth over other people in the group - just because they'd actually use/equip it - players opt to put everything up for random to ensure everyone gets a fair shot at loot.
On very small items I can understand the frustration, but I've found the community here isn't quite as dire as you've described it. If something is a legitimate upgrade for you, speak up about it. Let people know it would immediately benefit you and therefore the group - most of the time people aren't going demand small items be put up for random if someone actually needs it. However, that doesn't mean you should piss and moan and complain when people do want to random. Mention that it's an upgrade for you; if people say they'd rather random for it, then roll your dice and move along.
If you really want need before greed loot on P99, my advice is to join a guild that does regular members-only groupings. I can't speak for every guild on P99, but it does seem to be a tradition on this server to get together with your guildies and do some camps for experience and old-fashioned NBG loot.
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