Area Woman Not Good Enough Artist To Justify Eccentricities
 

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Area Woman Not Good Enough Artist To Justify Eccentricities

Brooklyn, NY — Admitting they could understand such oddball behavior from someone with an amazing creative vision, sources close to area painter Dina Paulson told reporters Tuesday that the 34-year-old woman is not nearly a good enough artist to justify her eccentricities. “Dina’s work is okay, but she clearly doesn’t have the talent to pepper her vocabulary with pretentious French phrases that nobody understands,” said acquaintance Allison McCarthy, adding that Paulson also insists on speaking in an obnoxious singsong lilt despite the fact that the self-styled bohemian struggles to secure group shows or sell any of her canvases. “Maybe if she had a firm grasp of light, or color, or perspective, I could overlook her choice to wear that yellow polyester raincoat everywhere. But right now, it’s just annoying when we’re out somewhere and she’ll suddenly launch into some weird chant she calls her ‘Grecian Jug Song’ or spend the entire time photographing her hands.” McCarthy further commented that the artist’s greatest talent probably lies in being exhausting and hard to be around.

I mean.. it's an Onion article.

didnt read

The Onion is generally pretty rad.

hope he prescribes lithium

Laughed, but not malevolently. :D

u finna bust cheeks?

That there is some 80s-level anti-queer stuff there. That you Donald?

Otherwise solid troll. Obviously triggered me, but I am a filthy communist.

*issues restraining order*