and 3) how scary your char looks :p

YES!

I went 3-4 levels (before they changed resists like 5-6 months ago or so) without any resists at all. I'm pretty sure I could count on two hands the number of resists I got leveling my necro from 26-35. I was hunting Saben Tucross at level 17 (level 22ish mob) and the millers in Qeynos Hills at 19. I landed darkness probably 80-90% of the time on red mobs.

Resists were way too easy for a time. Maybe they are a bit heavy now - but I definitely don't feel it when i'm leveling on low blues.

I don't know how you guys can complain, considering what has happened to Enchanters. The MR resistance of mobs is high IMHO making charming problematic and dangerous. I have charmed mobs in groups for DPS and it has worked out ok but its still not all that great. Soloing is just plain difficult but I still see people doing it, mainly Necromancers, Druids and Shaman. Negative Charisma having any effect is false. Chanters are the only class where Charisma has any bearing beyond vendor buying/selling.

Is low charisma giving greater fear chance/duration a myth?

Personally in the mid 20s I'm seeing many more Fear/Spook resists (at least a 2x higher resist rate) than darkness resists. Given that they're both listed as Magic (0) that shouldn't be the case. My necro is iksar with some -CHA gear so I've been wondering as well if that might be having some affect. Numb the Dead seems to be resisted at a much greater rate than darkness as well, and results in agro almost every time which is definitely not the case on my chanter.

Also I've seen fear breaking early sometimes especially on white/yellow cons - does fear have checks each tick like root/charm?

And bards, for missed notes as well as (this second part I'm not as sure about) mez/lull.

Fear resist is pure MR resist and level of the target. I am noticing that fear is resisted a lot more than it was in classic, too. (I leveled five or six Necromancers in my EQ career.)

Invoke fear seemed to have way, way better resist and duration rates.

It doesn't matter for mez - mez is always a constant duration if it lands. It affects your chance at a critical lull resist though (ie, a resist where the mob aggroes you after)