Get a rabbit instead they are much more loving and sociable. And not as needy/dependent as a dog.

Yeah, i know how this sounds, and i really don't mean it as an insult

the only thing more pathetic than a house cat is those who own them

real men own pets that can kill them. venomous snakes, angry tigers, monkey with knives for hands, etc.

sounds pretty shitty to be a real man tbh

every morning when you wake up, you have to fight for your life.

every night when you get home, you have to fight for your life.

I would keep, "The Predator" as a pet, but on some days I would just release a xenomorph to distract the predator while i get stuff done
https://i.imgur.com/8y9XCWn.jpg
im the guy w/ the gun sneaking away while they go at it.

I make it away from that fight, turn the corner and I am greeted by:
https://i.imgur.com/2eGlYLS.jpg
I don't know which i should fear more, but you know, hi-jack

I had a Columbian red tailed boa that got large enough to kill me. Had to start feeding it rabbits, and I hated having to kill the rat/rabbit first (I didn’t used to, but one rat fought back valiantly and opened up a big bite wound on my snake, so after that I had to start clubbing them over the head with a hammer before I dropped them in his tank), so I eventually sold her to a large snake collector

I used to like having her slither around in the grass in my front yard while I washed my car to watch people on bikes and joggers freak out as they went past this giant 6 foot snake

Then don't do it. You don't have to. I've never paid attention to prevailing fashion trends. It doesn't matter out in the real world. I simply wear whatever I think looks nice. I look at a photograph of myself from twenty or twenty-five years ago and I have the same type of stuff on back then as I do today. Nobody's ever given me flack over it and few have ever even noticed.

How so? I figure a good pet contributes to its household in some fashion. Cats serve their purpose and kill the various moles, mice, and other vermin that are found around the yard or in parts of the house which aren't otherwise easily reached. They do it without being as suicidal as ferrets tend to be. I could see cats being pretty bad for apartment dwellers but around here they're useful creatures to keep around.

Danth

This guy knows

we just gonna ignore the blatant irony?

I forgot cats kills mice, that is pretty useful actually

I kill mice, and more efficiently than a cat. I don't have to stalk and hunt, the mice literally walk into my trap.

then I am rewarded by that satisfying, SNAP sound

https://i.imgur.com/H9cZ3QX.jpg