My life is a bigger disaster than yours [Archive]

Asteria

12-30-2019, 04:24 PM

Is this a pity thread? I stubbed my toe this morning.

Ricky Nelson - Garden Party 1985 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFugRFKqjFg)

For some reason, all these anti-royalty doctors in this area REFUSE to make a housecall to our castle to give me a checkup because "medicaid doesn't pay for that! (loser.)" I've concluded this area is extremely hostile to the royal family. :(

Kaveh

12-30-2019, 04:37 PM

Eat more vegetables

Asteria

12-30-2019, 04:55 PM

Too much queso?

You might be onto something...the King/chef has been using an AWFUL lot of queso recently. Wow, thanks! :D

Eat more vegetables

Okay, this is probably good advice too. The King likes to eat alot of veggies actually, but we never have them for breakfast and very few before dinner. He likes to steam alot of squarsh, broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus etc...but we probably ruin the whole experience with all the processed cheese we usually sprinkled on them. :eek::o

Asteria

12-30-2019, 05:08 PM

Drinking Ashby's plum and apricot tea right now, maybe all day to save a life based on desperation and 24 hours of free time a day out of 24 hours. :cool:

solleks

12-30-2019, 05:13 PM

Don't bundle sticks

Asteria

12-30-2019, 05:18 PM

I never do the work of peasants, I learned that at age 3 or 4 Solleks, LOL :p:D

solleks

12-30-2019, 05:32 PM

Mmmmmmmhmmmmm

Asteria

12-30-2019, 05:39 PM

...Slumming with them temporarily might be a beneficial experience however for all involved! :)

DMN

12-30-2019, 05:40 PM

Forgot : named after a fecal bacteria.

Asteria

12-30-2019, 05:49 PM

Forgot : named after a fecal bacteria.

I'm sorry, do you speak any other languages other than English? :confused:

Se habla español?

Thank you for trying to help me though :)

solleks

12-30-2019, 06:15 PM

Depending on how hard you bundle your sticks you might never poop normal again. Definately not sustainable despite mainstream concession

Mead

12-30-2019, 06:32 PM

get a bidet

Asteria

12-30-2019, 06:48 PM

Depending on how hard you bundle your sticks you might never poop normal again. Definately not sustainable despite mainstream concession

Can you please explain in different words or more detail? :confused:

I have no idea exactly what you are talking about but it sounds like you might have an preoccupation with a certain kind of sex? :o:eek:

solleks

12-30-2019, 06:52 PM

Just a friendly forewarning about stick bundling from your neighborhood Nazi

Asteria

12-30-2019, 06:59 PM

Just a friendly forewarning about stick bundling from your neighborhood Nazi

Oh, how sweet! Thank you :) Not sure if this will ever come into play into my life...? I am no lumberjack after all...but my thanks all the same! :)

A new(possibly angry) peasant that sorta resembles a hairless ogre just moved right next to us in the trailer park. Allah bless him! :) Maybe we will have a great dialogue and get him to relax a little....

branamil

12-30-2019, 08:36 PM

NGL your life sounds horrible. It's really kind of easy to not be such a horrible fuckup but somehow you managed. You'd almost have to try to have such a shitty life as yours

Hazek

12-30-2019, 09:14 PM

Well this can help solve one of your problems. But do it at your own risk if you're a fatass and you fall off its not my fault.

https://i.imgur.com/M2H6e2y.jpg

Evia

12-30-2019, 09:19 PM

Well this can help solve one of your problems. But do it at your own risk if you're a fatass and you fall off its not my fault.

https://i.imgur.com/M2H6e2y.jpg

Or buy a squaty potty. Its like a foot stool you use when you go.

Asteria

12-30-2019, 11:15 PM

is this a tranny thread?

Nope, unless one of you wanted to turn it in to one? I never considered that but maybe that would make it more interesting and maybe a 1.5 stars thread. :p

NGL your life sounds horrible. It's really kind of easy to not be such a horrible fuckup but somehow you managed. You'd almost have to try to have such a shitty life as yours
Yeah, GOOD observation, friend! :) Thanks for the objective truth and participation.

Well this can help solve one of your problems. But do it at your own risk if you're a fatass and you fall off its not my fault.

Or buy a squaty potty. Its like a foot stool you use when you go.

Thanks, you two, pretty great suggestions really. Not a super fat ass..but this cheapy trailer potty seems way too fragile to stand on repeatedly... :(

Asteria

12-30-2019, 11:26 PM

I just got back to the trailer 10 minutes ago...had a lovely 2 hour walk on the beach in the moonlight and starting at dusk with the last of the sunlight. Had a nice chichat with a really close long-distance friend whilst walking. One person staying or living at a house up on the cliffs 500+ feet from the bewch shined a bright light on me twice. 😂🕵️*♂️ After thr 2nd time, he got a little flashlight shine too. It was quite romantic!

Well, it's almost time to dig in to some of the nightly feast the King has cooked for us while I was away trying to get my bowels busy, but they might be completely blocked up! :( Exlax was takenamy hours ago too along w 2 hot cups of coffee and 6 cups of hot herbal tea today.

I have to toke a little more 420 just to build up some appetite for these salmon Tacos w lettuce, avocado, and hot sauce..

Asteria

12-31-2019, 05:52 AM

Still stopped up and feeling really sad :(

vossiewulf

12-31-2019, 06:11 AM

Sorry Asteria. Never bothered me but yeah cheese is well known to do that to many people. Whatever it is, it's in what you're eating now, so change things up.

Speaking as someone who has had multiple run-ins with depression over the years, it's the 24 hours of free time that will get you. It's been 20 years since last one for me, but during that time I picked up ship modeling.

The subject isn't important, the important thing is that it challenges you, and you're sufficiently interested in it to take up that challenge and plug away at it. From simply educating yourself about a subject to any number of crafts where low-cost raw materials are turned into something that makes you happy, try to find to find something that rings the bell for you. PM me if you want some suggestions, there aren't too many hobby type things that I haven't at least tried out.

This is the latest project, taken after rigging of the guns was finished. Royal Navy cutter from 1803 and except for some off the shelf parts (like the guns), it's scratchbuilt with a holly deck. Definitely challenges and it's very good at making me forget whatever I'm worried about.

https://i.imgur.com/u1chekRl.jpg

Thrombosis

12-31-2019, 06:17 AM

Not really sure what's going on here, but it seems to be constipation related. Have you tried glycerin suppositories? Those things will shift concrete in my experience.

Jimjam

12-31-2019, 12:45 PM

You're an entertaining forum poster, OP!

I find an excess of beans can cause a backlog.

Happy new year to you.

Asteria

12-31-2019, 03:50 PM

Wow, alot of good replies! :eek::cool:

A really good friend is waitin' for me in Norrath and I'm pretty stoney feeling/slow ATM...I'll do my best to reply better during some downtime or after no coffee.

Oh - no movement yet and will check the Royal standing coffin(bathroom) storage for a suppository.

heyokah

12-31-2019, 04:39 PM

What is going on in here

Asteria

12-31-2019, 05:43 PM

This is the latest project, taken after rigging of the guns was finished. Royal Navy cutter from 1803 and except for some off the shelf parts (like the guns), it's scratchbuilt with a holly deck. Definitely challenges and it's very good at making me forget whatever I'm worried about.

https://i.imgur.com/u1chekRl.jpg

Wow, cool mini navy ship :eek: Do you ever have mock battles or navy re-enactments with other hobbyists?

Not really sure what's going on here, but it seems to be constipation related. Have you tried glycerin suppositories? Those things will shift concrete in my experience.

The King of the castle just told me where the suppos are located...will try to use 1 really soon. I hope it shifts whatever concrete like substance is dueling my innards to a test of will. :o Ohh nvm...he rushed in to look for them for me....oops... :o

Asteria

12-31-2019, 05:51 PM

Eat real food and exercise.

Regular exercise has started! :) Had a walk 1st thing with my coffee, and a mini one to watch the ocean with the cereal(mini wheats w raspberry slices).

You're an entertaining forum poster, OP!

I find an excess of beans can cause a backlog.

Happy new year to you.

Thanks ;) We do eat alot of beans but I thought they were supposed to help clean up backlogs? :confused::eek:

Happy New Year JJ!! Happy New Year to all of you, cool and normals!! *cheers*
Maybe I'll drink some for a change.

What is going on in here

Nothing good! Look at me...PATHETIC! :o

Asteria

12-31-2019, 09:16 PM

My closest 2 friends don't care that I have been stalked (here in my neighborhood, on vacation in Hawaii and LA) for at laeast 5+ years. There are plenty of reasons for some people to have gotten mad at me, but these special breed of losers have some members that are butthurt cops, retired cops, national guard etc...I have no problem with anybody or any group overall, I even think these very salty butthurt stalkers are very good people deep down inside and just highly troubled/confused. :(:confused:

vossiewulf

12-31-2019, 09:26 PM

Wow, cool mini navy ship :eek: Do you ever have mock battles or navy re-enactments with other hobbyists?

Some people do that, but they use ships that take them maybe a week to make. This one has already seen 12 months of steady work.

Wonkie

12-31-2019, 09:27 PM

Maybe they just have a tranny fetish and want to party with your backlogged backdoor?

the pumping action of the bottom sex is known to clear jams in the 'pipes'

it's like a plunger

solleks

12-31-2019, 09:45 PM

the pumping action of the bottom sex is known to clear jams in the 'pipes'

it's like a plunger

Hmm maybe you haven't plunged yet. A plunger pushes the shit extra hard into the hole it doesn't blow it out into your bathroom

Asteria

12-31-2019, 09:46 PM

Maybe they just have a tranny fetish and want to party with your backlogged backdoor?

Well, they sure wouldn't like me and you are gross :o

Asteria

12-31-2019, 09:56 PM

Why are you disgusting pervos shitting up my "can't shit" thread talking about trannies and buttsex?? :confused::confused:

You gross ones must have a HUGE tranny and anal sex fetish. :( Ewwwww.... :(:eek:

Hazek

12-31-2019, 10:20 PM

Hmm maybe you haven't plunged yet. A plunger pushes the shit extra hard into the hole it doesn't blow it out into your bathroom

lmao good observation

galach

12-31-2019, 10:34 PM

https://i.imgur.com/TIVp2.gif

Wonkie

12-31-2019, 10:42 PM

Hmm maybe you haven't plunged yet. A plunger pushes the shit extra hard into the hole it doesn't blow it out into your bathroom

Depends what side the pressure is coming from. It's a known risk in the art, my good chum.

Ganjar

12-31-2019, 11:03 PM

Peanut butter , I would stay away from laxatives if it's really bad . Once u manage to go , maybe probiotics and slimming tea ! I will hope for the best

Asteria

01-01-2020, 01:44 AM

Yeah, def could use more Hot tea and peanut butter, thanks for the good tips! :)

We had delcious BBQ pork spareribs, canned green beans w Valentina hot sauce, and steamed sweet potaters. Dessert of 1 Sees candy (strawberry truffle) and a small slice of Pecan Pie.

Movie of the night was Kong Skull Island in 4K with Dolby atmos 7.1 sound.

Shortly after finishing, some pathetic/mad/salty peasant nearby returned next door to slam many a door ferociously to punish everyone who had ever wrongrd them.

Asteria

01-01-2020, 06:05 PM

...Just got back from a very LOVELY and lonng walk on the beach. Ate my cereal there sittin' on a log and watching a very active and cute bulldog playing with rocks and sticks in the creek just a couple hundred feet away.

2nd cup of coffee of the day RN under the castle ramparts(trailer awning) but on the edge to spy lotta sunshine sky, treetops, and hear the chirps of the happy bird pals right above us.

Lovin' Every Minute of It (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bohVV_KlSHw)

Jimjam

01-01-2020, 06:21 PM

I know you're humble bragging about how awful your life is, but there are some elements that are so romantically appealing. The birds, the beaches, the life all around.

It's not the same but you have me excited to visit a holiday trailer on top of the cliffs I have access to when the weather clears out!

Asteria

01-01-2020, 09:07 PM

Yeah, do it Jim!! We all deserve a beach life in the physical world once in awhile. :)

Hazek

01-01-2020, 09:11 PM

It is sad to have to do, but I decided it was best to finally cut a feiend of 1 yearish out of my life for ahwile... I worry for her and hope that things will het better for her...but I have no idea how. :( TWENTYish suicide threats in the span of about a year is just a little too stressful for me.

Just several nights ago, we were sharing short mini videos with each other having a REALLY good bunch of laughs. I then mistakenly shared WKUK I NEED ATTENTION (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BRzlha-tZS4) without seeing the ending of the WKUK skit(knowing it would probably trigger her negatively). Well...this video clip did HEAVILY trigger her :( proceeding with lecturing about "YOU NEVER JOKE ABOUT DEATH".

Fast forward to last night....I'm not in the mood to EQ...I just wanna lie down and read/internet surf/news/research etc. Well...my friend must share EVERY single EQ death they are runnimg into while soloing (5 or 6 total) followed at least 5 times by stuff like..."Seriously considering the noose. and "Ready to end my life" "I have nothing to lose." "Wanna DESTROY stuff with a baseball bat."

Soo I peacefully and very diplomatically(but I obviously failed) try to talk my friend into playing something else, looking for a group etc. I eventually strain under all the self pity of "Nobody wants to play with me" and tell her how immature and obnoxious all the suicide threats over 1999 Elf-Sim *actually are.*

Well, guess what? All my honest criticisms over concern or love instantly turned into every time into a "Yoi do that too!" "Oh, but what about YOU" "You're not perfect!!" ad nauseam. No humility or coming clean from this person, almost ever...

A couple hours after all the very serious sounding suicide threats came a "Me any my ex(that hates ne now) used to make death threats like that Allll the time after we wiped. It's just comedy." "NEVER joke about death!?" :o:confused:

You're a lunatic why don't you go buy a diary instead of posting this dumb shit on the forums.

Wonkie

01-01-2020, 09:13 PM

How can you have an anime avatar and not be trans? :confused:

is it possible to learn this power?

Asteria

01-01-2020, 09:21 PM

You're a lunatic why don't you go buy a diary instead of posting this dumb shit on the forums.

Sorry you don't get to go on glorious beach walks... :(

Asteria

01-01-2020, 09:24 PM

How can you have an anime avatar and not be trans? :confused:

is it possible to learn this power?

Oh lol...is that a thing?? Thanks for letting me know lol. I have barely been into online communities/social media since 2009.

I have Phantasy Star Online as my avatar because that was one my very 1st MMO experiences and had a really fun time playing it on Gamecube with a good friend many years ago when I was in high school. I still play it once in awhile on the private server called Ephinea. It's really easy to install and play on modern computers that way. They even have built-in app support for super high resolutions like UHD/4k and above.

It's alot easier to slip in and out of than EQ sometimes if you have very limited play time.

Asteria

01-01-2020, 09:30 PM

You're a lunatic why don't you go buy a diary instead of posting this dumb shit on the forums.

You sound alot like my very troubled acquaintance Vaye...you 2 would be perfect for each other. :p

Nobody but him/her would be so triggered by my talking about what a psycho they can be.... :o

Hazek

01-01-2020, 10:22 PM

You sound alot like my very troubled acquaintance Vaye...you 2 would be perfect for each other. :p

Nobody but him/her would be so triggered by my talking about what a psycho they can be.... :o

Nobody is triggered by your irony. I simply despise you for good reason.

Mead

01-02-2020, 12:47 AM

Nobody is triggered by your irony. I simply despise you for good reason.

Sounds about right for a Bible-thumper

WaffleztheAndal

01-02-2020, 01:49 AM

Hazek

01-02-2020, 05:59 AM

Sounds about right for a Bible-thumper

I don't follow the Bible.

Mead

01-02-2020, 04:17 PM

I don't follow the Bible.

Islam

No wonder you are trash

Asteria

01-02-2020, 04:29 PM

So wait, op are you unemployed and living with a much older ex who takes care of you? Im not judging, just curious. I like hearing about other people’s lives, mine certainly hasn’t been all peaches and roses.

Yes, but I have have alot of hope I will be more independent and active soonish but still be on good terms with him. :)

Mead

01-02-2020, 05:37 PM

I appreciate your beautiful mind op

Hazek

01-02-2020, 05:43 PM

Islam

No wonder you are trash

Utter irony. The path of God is for the best of mankind and jinn. He doesn't guide the wicked. So enjoy your respite until you're humiliated and dragged into Hell. Or seek forgiveness from God. Not my loss.

Asteria

01-02-2020, 05:46 PM

if you believe asteria is a girl you got trolled

Lol @ you incels. "I hate girls, they CAN'T exist on my 1999 Elf Simulatour or ElfSim forumquest. They just can't!! Because I like it and girls ruin everything!"

We're all cringing hard or preying for you P99 incels.

My life is a bigger disaster than yours but my personality is just fine.

Asteria

01-02-2020, 05:58 PM

I pity anyone that has ever been doxxed by you like that lol...

I don't care whatever garbo you think about anything... enjoy yourself (without any romantic intimacy).

Asteria

01-02-2020, 09:40 PM

Dear Diary: Today was really good overall.

Had a most glorious beach walk for a couple of hours (despite strong winds and mist). Saw a single "cyclone" of 50+ seagulls flying in a long whirlwind type pattern not going anywhere particularly fast. I had a difficult time keeping my eyes open at times or not wincing on the right side of my face.

The prize is always worth the fight!

Madbad

01-02-2020, 10:27 PM

I don't follow the Bible.

same shite different book

DMN

01-02-2020, 11:17 PM

Only thing good about this shit tier thread is is that it is appropriately 1 starred.

Videri

01-02-2020, 11:44 PM

Yes, but I have have alot of hope I will be more independent and active soonish but still be on good terms with him. :)

Is he just a decent man doing the right thing? Or is it, like, you can't manage to separate for some reason? Seems like it could be tricky.

Anyway, good luck building more independence. I remember I felt a lot better and less stressed-out once I became financially independent.

Asteria

01-02-2020, 11:55 PM

Is he just a decent man doing the right thing? Or is it, like, you can't manage to separate for some reason? Seems like it could be tricky.

Anyway, good luck building more independence. I remember I felt a lot better and less stressed-out once I became financially independent.

He's just a decent man who mostly sticks to himself and likes my company I guess.

Thanks for the well wishes - Was stupidly slow/depressed a little bit 1st thing in the AM(gotta set alarm to stop oversleeping in) but the walk, talking to a good friend & Mom a bit made all difference into feeling alive again.

Kaveh

01-03-2020, 12:42 AM

Islam

No wonder you are trash

LOL’ed

Dunk of the year

Madbad

01-03-2020, 04:04 AM

Wait wait wait. So wait. Wait wait so wait...did you poop yet?

Asteria

01-03-2020, 08:39 AM

Yeahh....a few times actually...thanks for the concern. :o:p

Jimjam

01-03-2020, 09:26 AM

Happy poo year!

Lanzellot

01-03-2020, 09:38 AM

I have lived with my ex-boyfriend(much older) for 10 years.

Most of my neighbors hate or fear me.

My few friends and family don't trust me.

My poop gets really really stuck inside recently.

The end! :cool:

but in the end asteria what i remember you are a beautiul girl;)and play eq :cool:

kjs86z

01-03-2020, 03:17 PM

walking isnt exercise

Allishia

01-03-2020, 04:17 PM

https://www.metamucil.com/en-us/articles/Fiber-and-diet/psyllium-fiber-in-metamucil

Hope you feel better /nod

Allishia

01-03-2020, 04:48 PM

Walking is definitley exercise, not talking about 10 minutes, i walk over an hour a day its amazing.

And asteria isnt a girl i promise.

This is now the trans thread 3.0 Alisha is a tranny as well.

Wow, is there a reason to be such an asshole? I was just trying to help op with a fiber supplement.

JurisDictum

01-03-2020, 05:56 PM

Nobody is triggered by your irony. I simply despise you for good reason.

Sounds about right for a Bible-thumper
no, mead, it is not a matter of prejudice. frightening person.
(not JD, this is a hijacked account, hello pals :o happy year)

Asteria

01-03-2020, 07:08 PM

Happy poo year!

Happy poo year to you too! :p

walking isnt exercise

Well, for not exercise, it warms me up quite a bit and changes my breathing radically. Sometimes even my legs, back, and lungs a day or 2 afterwards.

Asteria

01-03-2020, 07:19 PM

https://www.metamucil.com/en-us/articles/Fiber-and-diet/psyllium-fiber-in-metamucil

Hope you feel better /nod

Wow, is there a reason to be such an asshole? I was just trying to help op with a fiber supplement.

Thanks so much! :)Sorry some of the troubled and angry forum trolls think is Rants N Flames and attacked you with some garbage post.

I'll be eating alot more peanut butter, less cheese, and walking much more than I used to in the last couple months of 2019. As well, it's time to see a doctor for some of these health issues...it's been years since I seen one for anything and some of these physical pains are ongoing for awhile.

Kaveh

01-03-2020, 07:27 PM

walking isnt exercise

Please don’t deter the obese from moving. Baby steps my friend, baby steps

Asteria

01-03-2020, 07:42 PM

no, mead, it is not a matter of prejudice. frightening person.
(not JD, this is a hijacked account, hello pals :o happy year)

Happy New Year to you too! ;)

Cecily

01-04-2020, 06:52 AM

Please don’t deter the obese from moving. Baby steps my friend, baby steps

Walking absolutely is exercise, anyway. Also good for getting those bowel movements going.

reznor_

01-08-2020, 01:11 AM

BlackBellamy

01-08-2020, 10:09 AM

Once when I was fourteen, I was sitting out on a curb by a local grocery store. I was talking with my best friend at the time. We were probably talking about something topical to the time, like whether the large pharmaceutical manufacturing complex nearby was indeed a Soviet nuclear target (it was), and whether we were in the immediate blast zone (we were not). This was the same spot where four years later Johnny Joe Hess would pull up with his Mercury Cougar and his pile of LSD and some of us were never the same after that, except I digress.

Anyway while Frank and I were sitting there, this old old woman came out of the store and walked over to us. She was a crone. If you could imagine a 900 year old Eastern European woman; half-witch and half-mummy, this was her. She turned to us and extended her finger and screeched out with a heavy accent: "Do not sit on the cold concrete!" then she made a fist and shook it, "Because you get the...hemorrhoids!"

So we looked at each other and were like yeah yeah yeah. Thanks old woman! Why don't you go curse someone else!? She left and soon afterwards so did we.

Forty years later I have hemorrhoids and anal fissures. If only I didn't constrict the blood flow to that area by sitting on cold stuff. This stuff is really inconvenient now at times.

My lesson to you:

ALWAYS TAKE CARE OF YOUR ASS!!!

Polycaster

01-08-2020, 01:16 PM

Forty years later I have hemorrhoids and anal fissures. If only I didn't constrict the blood flow to that area by sitting on cold stuff. This stuff is really inconvenient now at times.

My lesson to you:

ALWAYS TAKE CARE OF YOUR ASS!!!

I would think the greater lesson would be to listen to the warnings of old crones, as they are virtually always a literary device for the author to impart wisdom.

Smellybuttface

01-08-2020, 02:48 PM

I don’t think we’ve heard a timely update yet on OP’s constipation. We wait with bated breath!

Videri

01-08-2020, 02:59 PM

I don’t think we’ve heard a timely update yet on OP’s constipation. We wait with bated breath!

Oo, look at you, using “bated breath” properly instead of the disturbing “baited breath” I all too often see. You’ve got a good smelly butt head on those shoulders!

BlackBellamy

01-08-2020, 03:15 PM

Oo, look at you, using “bated breath” properly instead of the disturbing “baited breath” I all too often see. You’ve got a good smelly butt head on those shoulders!

I always use "abated" in an effort to jump-start a conversation about Shakespeare, because if there's one thing that get the ladies nice and wet, it's the bard.

Asteria

01-10-2020, 03:13 AM

Drink some fucking water for Christs sake, if you actually want to take a shit. God you people with the teas...drink at least a gallon of water every 24 hours and keep doing your beach walks. I'm beginning to think OP is a poop fetishist, I just wasted 10 minutes reading this thread.

Thanks, been much better lately in this way - sorry I wasted your time! :(
I'm not a poo fetishist and my original post was not specifically about the #2 issue which the thread may have devolved into... :o

I would think the greater lesson would be to listen to the warnings of old crones, as they are virtually always a literary device for the author to impart wisdom.

Yes! Never listen to me for I'm a just a youngish crone very lacking in wisdom points.

I don’t think we’ve heard a timely update yet on OP’s constipation. We wait with bated breath!

I'm better...things are much more regular in that way thankfully. :p