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View Full Version : On dick measuring theory: "Metric Dick Measuring"


big_ole_jpn
07-15-2016, 05:02 PM
As a girthy individual whose penis length stat alone fails to describe his above-average penis (lengthwise I'm right in the middle of the curve), I've been thinking about this for a long time. The typical way we describe penis size is woefully inadequate. A penis is its length and circumference -- why do we stop at length alone? A mafia of length-advantaged individuals has claimed dominance when in fact their overall penis mass may not be superior.

Length and circumference measurements would probably be roughly adequate, but this would fail to take into account irregularities in penis shape, asymmetries, etc (penis circumference is not uniform around the entirety of the shaft in most individuals, although mine is beautifully symmetrical and aesthetically pleasing personally).

The complex mathematics involved in taking multiple measurements of an irregular penis and calculating the volumes of each different segment of penis are beyond the average penis-measurer in the midst of a size contest. Therefore I posit that, if we must simplify it to one single measurement, penis size should be described by milliliters of volume displacement, measured by inserting the length of the erect penis into a known volume of water in a large (in my case) graduated cylinder or other measuring device. This same method could be used for comparisons of nutsac; a metric for comparing nuts seems not to have been yet devised as of writing this thesis.

I would appreciate it if we could move to this new system in all future discussion of penis size on this board, to do our part in advancing the quality of discussion in the wider world. For future references to this method I will be applying the provisional name "Metric Dick Measuring".

big_ole_jpn
07-15-2016, 05:06 PM
There are other measurements I am contemplating now, for instance insertion of the penis into a high-pressure volume of water to compare relative hardnesses and the resilience of erections (measurement of Dick Pressure). Any thoughts you could provide on these topics may be helpful to the advancement of Metric Dick Measuring.

fash
07-15-2016, 05:18 PM
Have any childhood traumatic experiences you need to share?

Pokesan
07-15-2016, 05:26 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrmZAXezkhA

Thulack
07-15-2016, 05:42 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXssR4ayO18