Prayer Shawl

[Jauna]

The one from that waterplace, not the orcplace.

[Jauna]

That thing for the shoulders from that mermaid in that zone no one goes to anymore since they removed the ZEM used by certain low WIS druids because other people were smart enough to not roll half elf. Yeah if you have it send me a PM, while I am logged into the game I get distracted by other things.

[Jauna]

Ugh sometimes I let my imagination run too wild when playing games nowadays. I bet the prayer shawl smells of fish and a little hint of the last person who owned it... I mean really when is been underwater probably used as a mermaids loincloth for fucking years before anyone went down there to get it.

[Jauna]

Ugh... and then I begin to wonder if other people can smell my character but then im reminded that not a lot of people use their imagination anymore... then I would feel less self conscious

[Jauna]

Now that I think about it.. I wonder what some races would smell like. Wood Elves might smell like Pine, or Dark Elves like Stale Water and... well I better not go through all the races right now just incase I need to bump my thread again.

[Jauna]

Erudites might smell like musty books, and barbarians would smell like a wolf/bear/mammoth orgy, or like an apothecary depending on who you talk to... is it strange that I learned the word apothecary from a video game and felt like using it?

[Donruss]

This is some funny shit. Wish I had one to sell you lol

[Jauna]

Now, Ogres I dont think would smell bad as some people would imagine them to be. I think they would smell like a butchers shop that no one really took care of, mostly dried blood and smoked meat and depending on what they caught that day. On second thought I probably done ogres last to give you all the idea on what a smoked dwarf might smell like. But oh well, someone sell me a fucking Prayer Shawl.

[Jauna]

Gnomes... gnomes... gnomes would probably smell like baby powder and engine oil. And high elves, oh man this might be hard to describe: You know how bathing was not really popular in the real world until about 100 years ago? Now imagine some royalty back in the iron or bronze age, they still wont take baths but they would really slap on the perfume and call it a day. Ever been to a good Renaissance fair? Yeah something like that.

[Jauna]

Dwarves I always pictured they would smell like old beer and sweaty crotch. I mean isnt that all they do? Drink and mine rocks all day? Or is this ignorant of me? or.. oh god what if I have been offending peoples imaginations with this thread all along..

[Jauna]

Half Elves might smell like shame and abandoned puppy. I mean their human father and wood elf mother just got together one night of passion and didnt know what to do afterwards. And they just dumped it off in Surefall Glades to fend for themselves. Yeah this all sounds a little mean but it must be hard being the only race mixed race in the game, considering its the year 3104 and you dont see any half ogres or half dark elves running around. And no, it will never be a wood elf male and a human female. Because when was the last time you seen a wood elf male? Yeah its been awhile hasn't it.

Ugh, Im running out of races to continue to bump this thread.. actually I wonder if I can find my old Dark Elf fanfics from 14 years ago around anywhere...

[Velerin]

Haha great, get this man a prayer shawl!

[Jauna]

Trolls... oh god I dont know how to explain this so I will just tell you a story.

About 6 years ago I had a job working nights at a walmart, pay was good, hardly any customers bothering you, and exercise from all the freight... but ya know, nighttime brings out the weird people, the in the middle of gender reassignment surgery people, drunk people and thief people.. and once a smelly person.

I dont mean smelly like oh you just got off your shift and you smell a little sweaty I mean this person had on a dirty sweatsuit jumpsuit on, pits stained, crotch stained. All this while he is standing in the freezer section looking at the TV dinners. The revolting stench of.. of... of poorly wiping his ass, mixed with sweat from sitting all day and maybe a little bit of crotchrot topped off with old clothing stained with... with with with oily skin excrement and his hair was so... fucking slimy. And pee, and since I am not an expert on pee stenches I am just going to assume it was his or his cat.. or dog. Ya know lets just go with his own pee, I dont wanna offend any animal lover people here.

After that night, at home sitting there still thinking about the customer with the red, grey and blue jumpsuit on I called my dad, due to the timezone difference I got his answering machine and I thanked him. I thanked him for making me eat my veggies as a kid.